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Tuesday, July 08, 2003

<  Session 1383 (Private/Phone)  >

ďUsing Your Essence ToneĒ

ďComparison and Difference within FamilyĒ


Participants: Mary (Michael) and a new participant, Kathleen (Curt).

Elias arrives at 10:09 AM. (Arrival time is 22 seconds.)

ELIAS: Good morning!

KATHLEEN: Good morning.

ELIAS: And how shall we proceed?

KATHLEEN: Can I start with asking you a question?

ELIAS: You may.

KATHLEEN: Thank you. I guess Iíll just jump right in. Iím currently an acupuncturist; Iím a healer. I guess Iíll start at the beginning. Iíve been told Ė or another friend of mine had a reading Ė that I belong to the group of Tumold?

ELIAS: Yes.

KATHLEEN: And Iím aligned with Ilda, which is what my sensing was, and then she confirmed it with you.

ELIAS: Yes.

KATHLEEN: I have somewhat of an understanding of what the belonging to and aligned with means, and as I understand itís not as common for people that belong to Tumold to actually go into a healing profession. Or is it?

ELIAS: At times individuals that are belonging to this family do choose to incorporate action in physical manifestations in relation to their natural expression of healing, yes.

KATHLEEN: Because I love what I do! I love it. Itís just amazing to be able to do what I do.

ELIAS: For this is a natural ability.

KATHLEEN: Iím just so grateful to be doing what I love to do! I donít have an understanding of what being aligned with Ilda actually means in relation to belonging to Tumold. Could you kind of briefly...?

ELIAS: Each essence that chooses to be manifest in this physical dimension also chooses to be grouping themselves with certain families of consciousness that express the same qualities as each essence. In this, each essence also, in different focuses, chooses to be aligning with different families to express other qualities, which allows each essence to express all of the qualities of all of the essence families in different focuses.

Therefore, in this focus, you have chosen to be aligning with the family of Ilda, allowing you to express those qualities in addition to the qualities that you express in relation to the family that you are belonging to.

Now; in this, Ilda is a family that expresses quite playful qualities, allowing them to interact with other individuals quite easily and in a playful manner, and also expressing the quality of exchange, which generates quite a complement in association with the qualities of the Tumold family. For this allows you to be exchanging experiences and information with other individuals, offering yourself and other individuals different perceptions and different information which may be incorporated in a manner to complement the healing actions also.

In this, the family that you are aligned with is, generally speaking, more obviously and overtly expressed. The family that you are belonging to is continuously expressed. It may be in some individuals somewhat more underlying than the qualities that are expressed by their alignment, but in some individuals those qualities that are expressed in their belonging-to family may also be quite obvious. It is merely dependent upon the individual and what direction they choose to explore in their individual focus.

KATHLEEN: Thank you very much.

ELIAS: You are welcome.

KATHLEEN: I was also given my essence name, which is Curt, and again I have somewhat of an understanding of the tone, that itís not the complete tone but itís a portion of the tone. Is there something I can do with this essence name, or something I can do with it that will assist me in the work that I do with people? I understand thereís a possibility of using it in a way to manipulate energy. I want to know if thereís something I can do with just the tone. Do I chant it? Do I...?

ELIAS: You may. I may express to you that if you are allowing yourself, in a manner of speaking, to feel into that energy, which is the energy of you as essence, in conjunction with your actions of healing, you may allow yourself to be much more open to your intuitional communications, and in this, you may be allowing yourself to manipulate energy in association with those individuals that you interact with more efficiently, being more sensitized to the expressions of the other individuals or what you term to be the conditions of other individuals.

In this, you may allow yourself not necessarily chanting this tone but merely generating an openness to it, and in a manner of speaking, you individually may...

KATHLEEN: Elias, excuse me just one moment. My little two-year-old boy has just woken up and I need to go get him. Iím sorry, hold on.

ELIAS: Very well.

KATHLEEN: (Speaking to her son) Okay, sweetpea. Itís okay. Good morning, sweetheart. Iím right here. No, weíre not going in the car.

(To Elias) Iím sorry; hold on just a second. Are you still there? Sorry.

ELIAS: Yes. (Smiling)

KATHLEEN: (To her son) There you go, sweetheart. There you are, my darling boy. Oh, youíre such a wonderful boy! (Pause)

ELIAS: Shall we proceed?

KATHLEEN: Yes, please. Thank you.

ELIAS: Very well. Now...

KATHLEEN: I didnít get the last part of what you were saying. I apologize.

ELIAS: Apology is unnecessary. (Laughs)

Now; in this, as to you individually, you may incorporate a type of method in which you momentarily allow yourself to concentrate upon this tone and perhaps even generate a brief visualization, transforming the tone into an energy, allowing that energy to wash over you, so to speak, and surround you. And in incorporating that action, allow yourself an openness, which you may discover may be helpful to you in your interactions with individuals that you are incorporating your healing action with. This shall allow you more of an openness to your own communications in relation to what you are tapping into with regard to the other individual. Are you understanding?

KATHLEEN: Yes, wow. Great, that sounds wonderful. (Slight pause) Are you there?

ELIAS: Yes.

KATHLEEN: Yes, that makes a lot of sense. I will definitely do that. I was like what do I do with this? (Elias laughs)

Letís see what else I have on my list here. I made a list so I could stay focused. I have a couple of life choices that have recently presented themselves. Iíve been doing a lot of work internally and working on myself, and Iím considering going back to school to study another aspect of acupuncture and again gathering information.

I feel like this is the time for me to gather information to put together. I feel like Iím creating my own specific style and technique that is going to be very different than what is done out there. Thatís my feeling, and I donít know if youíll confirm that for me, but thatís what Iím feeling. It feels like the right path for me, but I wanted to get any insight you might have on that. Itís called Five Elements acupuncture and I feel like I really resonate to it.

Also another aspect thatís come up around the same time is that Iíd like to have another child. I had this child on my own through artificial insemination. Iím contemplating doing that again, as I have still not met the life partner that I feel that Iím going to be meeting. But Iím getting older, and so in terms of biological clocks and so on Iím just concerned in terms of my timeframe.

I know itís kind of a double question there. (Elias laughs) Sorry to have kind of overwhelmed you. But these are the two issues that have kind of presented themselves at the same time. Iím thinking of both of them right now.

ELIAS: I am understanding. As to your first question concerning your healing actions, I may express to you quite an encouragement that you allow yourself to follow your impressions and continue your movement in this direction. You incorporate a natural ability, and in that, I may also validate to you that you are moving in a direction of developing your own unique method to be incorporating this action, which may be quite beneficial.

I am also acknowledging of your directedness in this expression, and in a manner of speaking, your dedication to your direction which is, in a manner of speaking, quite admirable. But it is also to be acknowledged how much you may be incorporating and expressing your individual creativity if you are allowing yourself to incorporate a direction in action in which you do not perceive it as work, which you have accomplished quite well.

KATHLEEN: What do you mean, in terms of what Iím doing for my life, my living, that I donít perceive it as work?

ELIAS: Yes.

KATHLEEN: Iím not quite sure I understand.

ELIAS: That you do not perceive it as work.

KATHLEEN: No, I donít! (Laughs)

ELIAS: Which I am quite acknowledging of...

KATHLEEN: Oh, thank you.

ELIAS: ...for this is the point, to be allowing yourselves, each of you, to incorporate your natural direction, and therefore offering yourself your own expression of freedom and incorporating playfulness rather than drudgery.

Now; as to your second question, I may express to you that I am aware that this is your desire, to be incorporating another child, and I may express to you that there is another essence what you term to be waiting to be entering into physical manifestation, if you are so choosing to be allowing that action to occur. I may also express to you, why shall you deny yourself this action, for it is a tremendous desire that you incorporate, and therefore, why shall you not?

KATHLEEN: I guess what holds me back is whether I choose to do it on my own as I did with my son that I have now, which is a tremendous joy and amazing experience in my life. He is the love of my life. But in terms of financial and physical help, itís been very challenging.

So, Iím torn. I have a feeling that part of me would love to be able to do this with a partner. On the one hand, I feel I should wait and allow myself the time, whether that be six months or another year, to see as things unfold if indeed the person who is my life mate comes in and this would be something we would manifest together. Or if not, then I would decide also if I choose to do it through artificial insemination, as I chose with my son.

Thatís where Iím kind of in conflict. Iím a little bit fearful. I work very hard allowing not being in a place of fear, but unfortunately I do feel I float back and forth.

ELIAS: I am understanding.

Now; be aware that this is associated with your beliefs and that you do incorporate choices. It is not as black and white as you perceive it to be presently. You may incorporate this action of facilitating another birth, so to speak, and it is not a matter of urgency. Allow yourself to relax and to listen to yourself. It is not as unclear, actually, as you may perceive it to be presently, for you are clouding your clarity by incorporating this urgency, which is unnecessary. There is no urgency in this situation.

You may be allowing yourself to relax and to incorporate more clarity as to what you want, and it may not necessarily be incorporated immediately. Let me also express to you that it may be beneficial for you to be allowing yourself to relax and to incorporate a temporary time framework in which you are not overwhelming yourself in concerning yourself with this matter, for you incorporate a tremendous expression of attention in relation to the small one that you are interacting with now. Immediately incorporating another small one may ensue with more conflict than you are incorporating now merely with the idea of another small one.

KATHLEEN: Thatís why I guess that one of my aspects is allowing myself probably a year, within a year, to go through this Ė to do more studying, spend more time with my son and get him to the next place where heís going to be.

ELIAS: Yes. I may be quite advocating of that direction in this present time framework, for I am aware within your energy that were you to be pushing in this urgency and incorporating this action immediately, you incorporate the potential to be tremendously discounting of yourself in that action, and judging of yourself for not incorporating enough time with the present small one.

This, I may express, in association with your individual energy, is a tremendous likelihood. Therefore, my suggestion is that you allow yourself a time framework and to relax, and if you are so choosing to incorporate that action futurely, that would be more advantageous.

KATHLEEN: Thank you. That helps.

Well, speaking of my small one, my amazing little boy, I wanted to know if you could tell me what his belonging is. Actually I have a feeling I know what his belonging is I think, but Iím not sure. I have a feeling about one of them but not with the other one.

ELIAS: And your impression?

KATHLEEN: My impression is that in some way he is connected to Ilda as well.

ELIAS: Correct.

KATHLEEN: I just donít know if heís belonging to or aligned with. But thatís the only one that really strikes me, that heís just such a little communicator.

ELIAS: Alignment.

KATHLEEN: Aligned with Ilda?

ELIAS: Yes. Belonging to Sumafi.

KATHLEEN: Iím not familiar with Sumafi, what the Sumafi is.

ELIAS: I have offered explanations for each of these essence families...

KATHLEEN: On the website?

ELIAS: Yes.

KATHLEEN: Okay, then I will explore that. And his essence name?

ELIAS: Essence name Adalia, A-D-A-L-I-A (uh DAY lee uh).

KATHLEEN: Do you have any suggestions as to how I may assist him best in his growth and his development?

ELIAS: (Laughs) To continue with what you are already incorporating in an expression of acceptance and allowance. I may offer you a suggestion to not be attempting to direct with this small one, for he is already aware that he is quite capable of directing himself. (Both laugh) You may merely incorporate conflict if you are attempting to direct for him.

KATHLEEN: Thatís very, very apparent. Heís such an incredibly aware little person. I mean, heís just truly amazing.

ELIAS: As most small ones in this time framework are, for they are manifesting within the objective insertion of this shift and they are aware of that.

KATHLEEN: Now, is there any connection? Do we have any connections, he and I? I feel like he does, and Iím assuming I must as well, but to any kind of, I donít want to say alien race, but star people?

When I first conceived him, or right before I conceived him, I had an experience where I was sitting in the airport Ė I was going to fly to Texas, my sisterís wedding Ė and I swear, I was sitting there and I felt alien energy around me. I felt energetic beings surrounding me, kind of just around me, and felt my whole body vibrating. I could feel them around me almost just like checking me out, like interviewing me in some way to... It was very strange and I donít have an explanation. I kind of wanted to know if you could confirm that yes, indeed, thatís what was happening. I didnít actually get pregnant that time, but I felt all this energy around me, almost like I was in a space portal. I was in the airport at LAX, but I felt like I was kind of on a parallel universe, like a space portal as well, where suddenly I was surrounded by these energetic beings.

ELIAS: I am understanding. And this is quite real and your experience and your translation of your experience is quite accurate, in actuality. And you do both incorporate many other focuses in other physical dimensions.

KATHLEEN: And the donor, is there a possibility that I will ever meet the donor, the man that provided the sperm for my child?

ELIAS: This would be your choice. It is possible, but it is also your choice.

KATHLEEN: You know, everythingís locked up in terms of records and stuff like that, so I have no way of knowing who he is.

ELIAS: I am understanding. Although I may disagree with you, that you do incorporate manners in which you may access that information through yourself.

KATHLEEN: Oh?

ELIAS: It is unnecessary to incorporate records or paperwork. You may access that information through your own communications with yourself through your intuition and your impressions.

But as I have stated, this is your choice whether you choose to incorporate an actual physical objective meeting with this individual or not. I may also express to you in association with that energy and with your energy, the potential that is expressed is that you may not necessarily be much interested in that individual. (Both laugh)

KATHLEEN: Well, you know, there you go! Maybe youíre right. I just got a CD with his voice, thinking that at some point my son would like to listen to his voice. He sounds like a really nice man and heís a chiropractor. Heís also a healer. We have very similar views on what we do, but we have some different interests.

ELIAS: (Laughs) Yes, and different personalities.

KATHLEEN: So, James and I do have connections to other focuses and this lifetime also. Is there something in his genetic predisposition that is... Iím not saying thereís an alien energy in him, but thereís something that connects him to that in this focus for him?

ELIAS: Yes. And I may clarify in explanation to you that your statement of alien energy within him or within you is actually more accurate than you realize. For as I have stated, you both incorporate many, many, many other focuses in other dimensions Ė in actuality, more so than in this physical dimension.

KATHLEEN: I think I understand what youíre saying. I mean, I do. Itís just I have to think about it. (Elias laughs) I mean, it connects to me.

Letís see, what else did I want to... Well, maybe Iíll address the sister issue. I have some issues with my sister in this lifetime, my sister thatís my full-blood sister. I would like to have a better understanding of what, I donít know, of what karmically, what is it?

We have the exact same birthday; weíre six years apart. Her name is Gayla. Thereís this conflict, thereís this competition, thereís just this weird... I donít understand what it is. Iíd like to find ultimately some way of resolving it, because I feel that it crops up in the third dimensional life that I have. It crops up in situations that I recognize and go, ďOh that has something to do with my sister.Ē I want to find peace with it and Iím really at a loss about how to do that. If you could offer me any...

ELIAS: What do you identify as your most conflicting expression with this individual?

KATHLEEN: I guess itís in relation to the rest of my family. I feel that somehow sheís always the center of attention, creating drama, and my family allows her to do that Ė that she can do no wrong and that sheís like the most wonderful individual in the whole world. Whereas, I donít get any kind of acknowledgment for the work Iíve done or the things that Iíve achieved or whatever. I feel bad or guilty that I should even want to have acknowledgment. But my sister, itís like, ďOh, sheís an MD!Ē but sheís also done a lot of things that they make excuses for. I always feel as though sheís somehow better than me in my familyís eyes, that sheís somehow this exalted being. I resent it, because sheís really very selfish and self-absorbed.

And here I come from the other aspect, at least I perceive myself as such. Iím in a healing profession that I love, and I feel that I do my best to give and to assist other people in any way I can. Thereís no kind of sense. Hereís this very selfish, self-absorbed being who creates drama, and everyone is around her supporting her and helping her, basically telling her how wonderful she is. I donít know. I donít know if that makes sense.

ELIAS: Oh, I am quite understanding.

KATHLEEN: That in a big nutshell incorporates my frustration with it. I alway feel in somewhat competition. Sheís thinner than I am, sheís more beautiful than I am, and sheís more talented than I am Ė all of these things! Thatís my messed up perception, I understand, but... (Elias laughs)

I struggle with this, obviously, and I really want to find some way of becoming whole and clean and at peace. I donít want to have this and it keeps coming up. I keep doing the work and Iím working and Iím working, and damn, it keeps coming up!

ELIAS: I am understanding.

KATHLEEN: So, help me. (Laughs)

ELIAS: In this, it is not concerning the other individual.

KATHLEEN: Oh, I know!

ELIAS: It is not concerning your sibling. Listen to what you have expressed to myself Ė very strong judgments, very strong comparisons.

Now; the manner in which you address to this and you change this expression is to address to you, to allow yourself to evaluate and discover what you are denying within yourself.

Now; understand that in what you are expressing, you are expressing some of your truths. I have been identifying recently with many individuals, expressing to them that you are all participating in another wave in consciousness.

Now; this wave in consciousness may be very empowering to each of you, dependent upon how you choose to move in it. This wave addresses to the belief system of truth.

Now; you may force energy in opposition to this wave and create tremendous conflict within yourself, or you may move with this wave and offer yourself tremendous freedom and great empowerment, for this particular belief system is very powerful. In this, what is being identified as truths are your most strongly expressed beliefs that you have generated as absolutes.

Now; what you have generated as your truths is that drama is bad, it is bad to be expressing self-centeredness or selfishness, and that it is good to be a giving individual. These are very strong judgments, but also recognize that they are acceptable expressions if you are recognizing that they are your preferences. They are associated with your preferred beliefs, but they are not absolutes.

Therefore, another individual, such as your sibling, may be expressing quite different preferences or preferred beliefs which may not be in conjunction with yours, but they are not wrong. They are her truths, which are different from your truths.

Now; as I have expressed many times previously, difference is threatening, sameness offers validation. But this is the point in shifting, to be accepting, and in acceptance, difference is accepted also and it no longer is viewed as a threat. You may continue to incorporate your preferences and your opinions and express your preferences. But recognize that your preferences are unique to you, and in acceptance do not express judgment in relation to the differences of other individuals and their behaviors and their expressions and their choices.

Your sibling expresses in the manner in which she does for this is her method to generate the type of interaction that she prefers, and offers her an avenue to accomplish what she wants. Some individuals express drama quite intensely and that is not bad; it is merely a difference. It is their method and their choice to accomplish what they want.

Now; you may not prefer to be generating drama for it expresses conflict with you, and you do not wish to be incorporating conflict and it is not associated with your intent in this focus. In her intent, there is an element of intensity which is expressed in her focus. Therefore, she is generating experiences and an energy which is in alignment with her intent.

Now; with you, as you allow yourself to examine what you actually want and discontinue comparing yourself with other individuals, you may begin to lessen your conflict with your sibling, for you shall move into an expression of it matters not what she is creating. What matters is what you are creating and what you are paying attention to. You are concentrating your attention and your energy in comparison, which comparison is continuously a discounting of yourself.

KATHLEEN: Right. I guess thatís the crux, how do I stop myself from comparing? I think Iíve made a tremendous amount of progress so far.

ELIAS: I shall offer you an exercise that I have offered recently to another individual. This may initially appear to you to be quite simplistic, but you may be quite amazed at how it may alter your perception. I shall express to you, for one entire week you shall incorporate the action of physically noting every time you generate a comparison of ANY type. In each day, every time you generate any type of comparison, of any type, you shall physically note this.

Now; at the finish of your one week, I may express to you, you shall be much more aware and noticing how often you generate this type of action of comparison, which prior to the finish of your one week, you shall already be amusing yourself and recognizing how unnecessary this action is, and allowing yourself choices.

KATHLEEN: I will do that. Thank you.

Letís see, itís so much wonderful information. Weíre coming up to our last fifteen minutes of our meeting and I wanted to consolidate what I really need to find out.

I kind of went over it a little bit with you, and I guess, point blank, is that Iím in a situation in my life where Iím starting to allow myself the opportunity to date or Iím opening myself up to the possibility of dating. I havenít been in a relationship in quite a few years. I was married; it didnít work and so on. My question to you is do you see or is there a possibility of someone, my life partner, someone wonderful coming in who wants to share my life with my son and me?

ELIAS: Yes, this is a possibility. I may express to you that if you are genuinely paying attention to yourself and aware of the energy that you are expressing outwardly, you shall allow yourself to draw another individual to you quite effortlessly. Be aware of the energy that you are expressing outwardly. In that awareness of trust and acceptance of yourself, you shall naturally draw other individuals to you that you may potentially be coupling with, if you are so choosing.

KATHLEEN: (Laughs) I had a friend who was concerned because I wanted to go back to school and back into a situation, and I already have a very full plate. I have my practice that Iím starting and my baby, and now if I go back to school, my friend was like what about you, the woman? What about you, dating? What about you in relationship with men or whatever? I said that if Iím following my heart and Iím following my path, continuing my studying, which feels like what I should be doing, then Iím on the right path and therefore...

ELIAS: Correct.

KATHLEEN: ...Iím aligned with where Iím supposed to be. Whoever is meant to come into my life will be there, because Iím doing what my heart is telling me.

ELIAS: Correct. This is paying attention to you, trusting yourself in your direction and expressing an acceptance of yourself. You are correct, that in that action you shall draw to yourself individuals that shall be of like energy.

KATHLEEN: Right, and obviously thatís what I want. I know that itís very important. I have to be with somebody that gets it, if you know what I mean.

ELIAS: Yes. (Laughs)

KATHLEEN: It canít be someone thatís not even open to getting it. Okay, good. Thatís my gut feeling on all of that, so thank you for confirming that.

Do you see my practice continuing to be successful? Iím in a process right now, for the first time in my life attempting to be financially independent. My family has been very supportive in helping me my whole life. Iím going to be 43, and now I have my practice and Iím slowly building it. Do you see this as, again, Iím staying in line with what Iím supposed to be doing and it continuing to be successful?

ELIAS: Correct, and as I have expressed to you previously in this conversation, yes, you are moving in a direction of successfulness in association with what you are generating and allowing yourself your expression of creativity, which shall allow you to incorporate unique methods in association with your healing.

KATHLEEN: Another aspect of what Iím doing with my healing is something thatís called NAET, which is a type of energy work, allergy elimination, that Iím really passionate about. I really think itís a wonderful, wonderful modality. Everybody else has their different perspectives of it and successes, but for me it really feels like something thatís a very powerful thing for me to be doing. I just recently put out the expense of purchasing a computer system to assist me with my NAET, if you will. I just got it and Iím feeling a little anxious. Can you confirm that this NAET is something really in line with what Iím supposed to be doing as well?

ELIAS: Yes.

KATHLEEN: Okay. So thatís a good thing, too. (Laughs with Elias) So, good, my instincts are correct.

ELIAS: Yes. Continue to listen to yourself.

KATHLEEN: Yes, I think Iím pretty intuitive, arenít I?

ELIAS: (Laughs) Quite so!

KATHLEEN: If I pay attention...

ELIAS: And trust yourself.

KATHLEEN: ...and trust myself, Iím just full of all kinds of interesting information. (Elias laughs) I guess thatís probably why I want to be able to assist people the best I can. I recognize that Iím there to assist them in their healing.

ELIAS: Correct.

KATHLEEN: Each individual makes choices, and by us meeting, itís like thereís an agreement that weíll work together.

ELIAS: Yes. KATHLEEN: And at any rate, even if they donít achieve complete wellness, the experience that weíve agreed to participate in, they benefit from; we both benefit.

ELIAS: Yes, you are correct.

KATHLEEN: Yes, thatís kind of how I approach my healing.

A couple of quick focus verifications. I have a memory or a focus memory of being a healer in the time of Jesus. In that lifetime I had a son who also had healing abilities. This memory came back to me right before I got pregnant, that I didnít feel like I was a good mother. Anyway, my son was a follower of Jesus during the time of the persecution. The Roman soldiers came to crucify anybody who was associated with Jesus, so I created an herbal decoction and I accidentally poisoned my own son.

ELIAS: Correct.

KATHLEEN: This is true, right? This is a memory, right?

ELIAS: Correct, yes.

KATHLEEN: Do you know who my son was in that lifetime? Is it anybody thatís here in this lifetime with me now? (Pause)

ELIAS: Your present small one.

KATHLEEN: Heís the same one?

ELIAS: Yes.

KATHLEEN: Wow! I had a feeling, but I wasnít sure. It kind of made me feel a little uncomfortable to think that, because itís still a memory that I donít want to say haunts me, but it still affects me in relation to my son now. I worry about him, you know?

ELIAS: Let me express to you that is another focus, different choices, different experiences. And they are not bad, they merely are experiences, and you incorporate many, many focuses. Therefore, each focus is generating their own unique experiences. You do manifest many times with the same essences. Therefore, this is not unusual that you would be generating those experiences in that focus and experiencing very differently in this focus.

KATHLEEN: I also experienced two deaths in my life where I found the person that had died. The first time was when I was five years old and I found my sister that had drowned. I had another sister before Gayla, and she drowned. I found her in the pool. I remember finding her and then feeling a tremendous amount of guilt that I somehow hadnít kept an eye on her and watched her.

I recovered a memory of when I found her, that I actually saw her ascend. My feeling at that point, in its purest form was why does she get to go home and I have to stay here? (Elias chuckles) Itís the adult layering of the guilt and the grief and everything else that imprinted on me. But in my childís memory, my childís experience of it was this pure sense of where is she going and why does she get to go home and I have to stay here? Any thoughts on that or...?

ELIAS: I may express to you, in that experience you have offered to yourself an objective recognition that you are more than what you appear to be in one focus, and that there is, in actuality, no death, so to speak, merely a transition from one area of consciousness to another and generating exploration in all areas of consciousness.

Now; in that experience, you allowed yourself to witness, so to speak, an actual movement of another individual to confirm your knowing of continuance of each individual.

Now; you also incorporate many different beliefs which have been quite strongly influencing of you, and you do automatically express, once again, comparisons which discount yourself, and you express judgments of yourself automatically.

KATHLEEN: Boy, I never saw that part of it. Itís true. It started really early for me. Maybe thatís when the whole thing started with the comparison for me.

ELIAS: Somewhat prior to that incident, but at that time you were already expressing this quite strongly.

KATHLEEN: Wow. Powerful!

And I found my mother. My mother passed away, passed over about a year and a half ago. I guess I just need to know that sheís okay. I understand that we made an agreement that I was supposed to be there because I was the closest one to her. It was a very, very hard experience to have, because my mother... As you were speaking earlier, thereís the safety in validation, and difference makes you feel uncomfortable or unsafe or whatever. My mother and I were the same in my whole family. So when she left, then it left me with everybody else who Iím very different from.

ELIAS: I am understanding. But in this also recognize that you chose and she chose for your energy specifically to be present at that time framework, for there was a recognition of the type of energy that you naturally express. Although you discount yourself quite frequently, you do incorporate a natural ability in expressing outwardly a type of energy which in itself is healing and facilitating. This is the reason that this was the energy that was chosen to be present in that time framework. Are you understanding?

KATHLEEN: (Quietly) Yes. Well, I guess those are most of my questions. I donít know, part of me says I should have let you just tell me more about me, instead of... (Elias laughs) Itís like I guess I need the reassurance, like what you just said about my natural ability. I guess I need the reassurance that Iím okay.

ELIAS: Yes.

KATHLEEN: I need to be told, ďThese are your special qualities.Ē

ELIAS: (Chuckles) You incorporate a natural ability in facilitating a calmness and a warmth, in your terms, which is quite recognizable by other individuals. In this, perhaps we shall express futurely another meeting in which we shall engage conversation solely concerning yourself and not other individuals, and perhaps you may, in that time framework, be somewhat more acknowledging of yourself rather than automatically discounting of yourself. Practice your exercise and offer yourself freedom.

KATHLEEN: Offer myself freedom?

ELIAS: Yes, in allowing yourself your choices in association with your preferences, and acknowledge yourself in trusting yourself.

KATHLEEN: Yes, these are all good suggestions. Itís one of those things where I recognize that I have gifts and that Iím so fortunate and can make a difference for people, all of that. I recognize this, but youíre right, I do spend a lot of time discounting myself, which really uses up so much energy.

ELIAS: Yes!

KATHLEEN: What a waste of energy! (Elias laughs) All these other wonderful things, putting it towards me in a positive way and confirming my abilities versus doubting them.

ELIAS: (Laughs) Hear, hear!

KATHLEEN: Right. I thank you very much.

ELIAS: You are quite welcome, my friend. I shall be anticipating our next meeting. To you in tremendous affection and much encouragement, and somewhat of a playfulness (laughs), I express to you, my friend, au revoir.

KATHLEEN: Yes, thank you very much. Au revoir.

Elias departs at 11:16 AM.


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