Sunday, November 04, 2001
ďAccepting a Loved Oneís Choice to DisengageĒ
ďMovement into Genuine AcceptanceĒ
Participants: Mary (Michael) and Georgia (Jacob).
Elias arrives at 2:15 PM. (Arrival time is 23 seconds.)
ELIAS: Good day!
GEORGIA: Good day! Itís good to hear from you again! (Elias laughs) Itís great, in fact! You know, I keep trying to get with you, and something always happens and it comes later, but itís for good reasons. (Laughs) So, yes, something important came up that I would like to talk to you about.
But first, before I get into what I call my serious things, I want to know, I think Iím emotional or thinking in my Ė I donít know what you call it Ė the way I process things? Iím not sure. Which one am I?
ELIAS: Emotional focus.
GEORGIA: Okay, most people are. Thatís me. Okay, great! I was wondering, because sometimes I can think about things, set myself apart from it, and see it from more than one perspective. So I was wondering, like I can understand Ė as long as Iím not involved in it Ė other peopleís viewpoints, and be a good arbitrator or something like that. (Elias laughs) But I sure canít do it for myself! When Iím involved in something, Iím totally emotional, yes! Thank you.
I wanted to find out for my grandchildren, because I forgot to ask that, I want their orientations. Like for Joey, what is his orientation?
GEORGIA: Common. Are all of them common? (Pause)
GEORGIA: Okay, even Elizabeth?
GEORGIA: Great! You were going to tell me ... Elizabeth is about five or six weeks old now. Has she chosen her alignment yet? (Pause)
ELIAS: Alignment, Sumari.
GEORGIA: Oh, wonderful! Great, like her aunt!
My husband went to the doctor the other day, and we found out he had emphysema. I know heís been working to transition, hasnít he?
GEORGIA: Yes, right. And heís ... I find it hard, myself. (Emotionally) Iím trying very hard to accept what heís doing, with the smoking and stuff like that, and I put that in there for other people who are going to read this. But at the same time Iím trying to accept it and tell myself that itís his choice and itís okay. I think Iím slowly getting there, but sometimes I still feel very sad and very angry, and I want to jump on him and say ďStop, stop!Ē and then I realize thatís not what you do. (Elias chuckles) I donít want him to die right now or anything like that, yet at the same time I want to be accepting of what heís doing, and itís very hard for me.
ELIAS: And once again, this is another opportunity to be turning your attention to self, for regardless of what he is choosing in the method, so to speak, to be moving himself into disengagement, it matters not. For let me express to you my friend, even if you held the ability to alter this dis-ease, so to speak, it would matter not, for the individual is creating a particular direction in his movement, and therefore if one avenue is diverted, another avenue will be engaged.
GEORGIA: Oh, yes, I know, I know. Iím trying very hard to just pay attention to what Iím doing and let him do his thing, and yet I find it hard because I do care. I donít want him to ... in my point of view, in my opinion, itís a very hard death, because you drown slowly. I find that very sad, but at the same time I know itís his choice, and he might not choose to go on that long, anyway. He could choose another way. But whatever choice he makes, Iím trying very hard to just go and be myself, and at the same time be here with him and say, ďHey, itís okay.Ē But itís hard.
ELIAS: The reason that you experience difficulty, my friend, is that you are expressing certain issues to yourself, certain beliefs that are quite challenging. For you express a love for this individual, and in this the individual is creating choices that you hold strong beliefs concerning, that you are not choosing within your experience, and therefore your understanding objectively of the other individualís choice to be creating this type of expression is quite limited.
But also you are offering to yourself the opportunity to examine YOUR expressions concerning disengagement of another individual, the separation that you perceive and the discontinuation of interaction that you hold in fondness. This is a very strong veil of separation which has been created through your beliefs. It is a very strong mass belief, which creates more of an intensity of the affectingness of the beliefs in relation to individuals, that there is this tremendous separation which occurs in disengagement.
I am quite understanding that in this time framework, in relation to most individuals, it matters not how much I may reiterate that these are illusions of veils and that they are not necessary and that in shifting your perception you may continue to be interactive with the individual and not be experiencing this separation.
Within your physical dimension the beliefs are so strong that what I express to you appears inconsequential and of little value, for you create the reality in association with the beliefs, and you do create this tremendous veil of separation between yourselves continuing within physical focus and those that discontinue.
GEORGIA: Youíre right, we do; I know that. I comprehend what youíre saying; I understand what youíre saying. I even, at some level, know that what youíre saying is true. I get frustrated because I canít comprehend how to relax that veil and let the people I love into my life again. Iíve lost people I love. I know they are still here, I know they know whatís going on, and I know theyíre over there, too. Theyíre not ďover thereĒ Ė everything is here right now, I know that Ė but still I have the limits to our vocabulary, I have the historic concepts and our ideas and beliefs to try to express what Iím trying to say. I understand what youíre saying, and I am looking forward to the time when I can actually experience that. But right now Iím not there, and I find it very frustrating and sad because Iím not there yet.
ELIAS: I am understanding. I may also express to you that this veil of separation is being quite emphasized in this time framework to allow you each to examine its strength in your individual beliefs and also allow you the opportunity to genuinely address to this particular belief.
In this, I may express to you it matters not whether you are examining this expression of separation in relation to an individual disengaging or in relation to separations in relationships of any type, in physical separation of location or of intellectual separation or what you view as emotional separation. Any type of disengagement within the concept of any type of relationship, especially within this time framework, is exaggerated in the associations that you create through your perceptions, for you are addressing to this concept of separation and lack of separation and addressing to how you may be dropping these veils.
GEORGIA: Oh, okay! That explains a lot of the stuff thatís going on, too, because, like you said, everything is so exaggerated right now. The way people are dying with AIDS for instance, or emphysema, or the WTC and Pentagon, is bringing us all to look at this, in a way.
GEORGIA: Yes. I see what youíre saying there. You canít get away from it! (Both chuckle) Because I have definitely been doing that, and Iím not ... how can I say this? I feel that bond here now and I still have that veil continuously, tremendously, and yet I know that heís not really going anywhere, that once thatís gone I can be with him. Thatís not really him, weíre really one in the ultimate, and yet at the same time weíre our unique selves. Iím looking forward to that in a way, to be with him again when heís himself. Well, heís himself now, but when heís the self he misses and wants to be, and heíll be that again. Heíll realize who he really is. You know what Iím trying to say?
ELIAS: I am understanding.
GEORGIA: Yes, and I can just tell him, ďIím so happy now that you are who you really want to be, finally, again. Again? You always were! Itís just you couldnít see it.Ē Sometimes I canít see it either, but I KNOW what a beautiful person he really is. Itís like my sister. Iím hung up on this edge again here, but itís the way Iím trying to explain it. I see him this way too, because I know he is.
One morning I was asleep and then she was there, but it wasnít her physically, it was her the way she really is. Iíve never seen anything so beautiful or awesome in my life! I was half asleep and I was seeing her, I donít know, her soul, her real self or at least an aspect of it, that allowed me to see more of her than Iíd ever seen of anybody, including myself.
ELIAS: An expression of essence.
GEORGIA: Yes! It was beautiful, and she was what you would call simply an angel, right? That was the concept that most people would see. She was total love, total acceptance of me! And my sister on this side isnít that way. We always fight! (Laughing) But I could see who she really was, and that just told me that if sheís that way, so are we. Everybodyís that way.
ELIAS: You are correct.
GEORGIA: I try to hold that concept in my mind. Even people I donít like, theyíre really awesomely wonderful like you said, the most awesome things that we can imagine. I can see that, and I know heís the same way. I see him when heís [unintelligible] and I dislike him when we have a fight. (Elias laughs) I will miss him while this veil is here, I know it, and it makes me very sad. Yet at the same time I really do ... I hope Iím beginning to accept that his choice is okay. I think I do, sometimes. I think Iíve reached that point that this is okay because itís his choice, and I feel at peace with it. Then other times it just makes me so sad.
ELIAS: What you are expressing, my friend, is your sense of peace concerning the other individualís choice, and the reason that you experience sadness is a communication to yourself concerning what YOU are creating.
GEORGIA: Exactly! Yes, I know, I know itís what Iím doing that makes me sad.
ELIAS: Correct. For you are denying yourself choices and you are creating the expression of separation, and therefore you generate this emotional communication to yourself of sadness. You are not sad concerning the other individualís choice. You are sad concerning YOUR choices to be continuing in the expression of separation and denying yourself choices concerning your genuine ability to not be expressing this separation.
GEORGIA: How can I not experience this ... oh, I know, I just can accept that itís not a separation at all! (Laughs)
ELIAS: Correct! (Laughs)
GEORGIA: Itís like, ďHow can I stop that?Ē And itís because itís not really happening. Is that what you mean?
GEORGIA: Itís that separation is not really happening at all, itís just my perception that creates it.
ELIAS: Correct, but your perception does create reality.
GEORGIA: Oh, yes, I know, but thatís where my perception is right now, and I need to try to just expand a little bit more and look at it a different way. (Elias chuckles)
ELIAS: In a manner of speaking. Ha ha ha!
GEORGIA: All right! Thank you! Youíre right, itís not really a separation; I know that. But at the same time I realize where Iím at right now, and sometimes I get there and I feel that it is. In fact, Iím there almost all the time right now, because Iím like, this is going to happen and itís going to whack me right between the eyes. Iím telling myself, ďDonít go there, just live right now,Ē and I find that hard to do sometimes, especially right now when Iím talking about it. I donít think about it all day or anything like that, and I try to live right now, which Iím not very good at, but I try. (Georgia laughs and then Elias laughs) I mean, my mind wonít shut up, so itís hard for me to stay in the now. I find it extremely hard to stay in the now because Iíve trained my mind to plot the future.
ELIAS: I am understanding.
GEORGIA: Iím trying to stop doing that. Iím trying to just say, ďItís really nice right now; I really like the way it is. Letís enjoy it the way it is right now. (Elias chuckles) Heís happy, Iím happy. Letís go for that for right now.Ē And it works! Iím happy and heís happy.
GEORGIA: Because weíre talking about it, Iím feeling sad right now. But most of the time heís so happy, and that makes me happy too. It helps me be happy too, because ... I am. I like where Iím living, I like ... you know, you were right. He wanted to get out of that assisted living, and he got out. (Both laugh) I had choices to make at the time, and my choice is the one that made ME feel the most comfortable, which was to live with him because otherwise I would not have been happy. I may admit itís a belief system, but thatís the belief system, and it made me feel better, and it was no sacrifice whatsoever. I donít feel like I gave up anything to be with him, except maybe a little bit of aggravation, and I would have still been aggravated because Iíd have been with him a lot. (Elias laughs) Iím happier now than I have been in a long time, and itís because of the choice I made.
GEORGIA: It was the best choice for me.
ELIAS: You are correct.
GEORGIA: I donít comprehend people who think Iím making a sacrifice, because itís NO sacrifice and they canít see that. Iím happy. How can that be a sacrifice?
ELIAS: It is not; it is a choice.
GEORGIA: Thatís right! Itís a choice! I chose this because itís what I wanted, not because I had to do it. So thatís not a sacrifice.
GEORGIA: But their view of realityís different than mine, so thatís okay. I really am happy. Iím just totally amazed at how happy I am that we have this time together right now, that we can learn to love each other again and be together, and thatís okay.
ELIAS: Very well.
ELIAS: I am acknowledging of you in recognizing that you are merely creating a choice. But you are creating a choice which you experience comfort within, for it is a choice in which you are also listening to you.
GEORGIA: Yes, because I did. I had choices that didnít make me feel comfortable and that wouldnít make me happy if I had done it. I chose the choice that would make me happy.
GEORGIA: At the same time it was the choice he wanted, which was fine.
ELIAS: I am understanding.
GEORGIA: Weíve happily got the same choice together, so Iím glad about that. Itís just ... well, letís get off of that now. Letís get on to something different; we donít have that much time to talk. I could talk to you all day but... (Elias laughs)
Sometimes I dream about The City, I think. I think itís The City. Iím wondering Ė and this one is really hilarious Ė I was with some people in a garden, and it was like a class but it wasnít really a class. I was standing there, telling them I thought ... there was a book there, and I was explaining something about the book. The title word had a ďWĒ and at the end of it Ė I couldnít see the whole thing Ė it ended with a ďC-T.Ē I thought, ďWhat is she doing out here with no computers, teaching the software Word Perfect?Ē But then she picked up the book Ė and it was me, right, I picked up the book Ė and I could see, because I was watching my dream too, that it wasnít Word Perfect, it was World Perfect. (Laughing) She was telling these people how to create a perfect world! Iím like, ďOh wonderful, like I know how to create a perfect world!Ē (Elias laughs) That one was fun, that one was hilarious. It had me laughing my head off.
But the other dream, I was in a very tall building that was shaped not like a pyramid per se but it still came to sort of like a ... it had slanted sides but they were curvy not pointed. Around the top edge was a big platform with no walls, and we were up in the clouds. It had beautiful tile work or bricks around it that made a pattern that I canít quite remember, because this was a long time ago. There were sort of semi-triangles on the bricks. They were really pretty colors like red and black and green Ė I mean yellow, not green. We could walk clear to the edge and look over and see, and we didnít have to be afraid weíd fall off. I knew if we did fall or if we did walk off the edge we wouldnít fall, we would just float down. It was really neat because we were up in the clouds.
I think those two dreams took place in The City, and I always go to the park; theyíre usually in the park. But that City thing was really so high, I mean you were right there with the clouds. It was wonderful!
ELIAS: Yes, you are correct.
GEORGIA: I like the World Perfect one, like I can tell people how to build a perfect world! (Elias laughs) That really, that one was funny! I donít remember much about what went on in either dream; itís just that it was beautiful on that building and I really loved that park. (Elias chuckles) Itís the place I love to go; I go there all the time.
I have dreams about the shift, too, that tell me not to be afraid of whatís going to happen. This one I had, I was standing on a field at an airport, an airbase, a military base, and there was a bomber there, a B-52. A meteor went right through the fuselage and set up a puff of dirt underneath it, and Iím thinking, ďOh, wow, if meteors are falling I need to go home.Ē I started to go home, and I decided to walk. Big meteors were falling everywhere, but they werenít making any holes in the ground. They looked like fake rocks like they used to have in old-fashioned movies. They didnít look like real rocks when they hit the ground; they looked like they were made out of paper mache or something.
But they were huge, as tall as I am and as big around. I was looking at them and thinking I donít want one of those to fall on me, because even though they look fake, theyíre pretty heavy, Iím sure. One fell right in front of me, and then it started rolling toward me and Iím like, ďAh, I canít run anywhere!Ē And, you know, I thought, ďIím not going to be hurt.Ē I stood still, and it rolled up to my toes and stopped. Iím like, ďSee, I was right, I didnít get hurt,Ē but I still needed to go home, and I started walking home along the edge of a highway.
Now, where I used to live the highway would be up high and then the sidewalk would be down below; the little access road was a little bit lower than the freeway or the highway sometimes. I was walking on the access road or the little road below the freeway, and the meteors were running down the highway, and Iím like, ďI need to get home.Ē But I looked up and I saw that the meteors were keeping pace with me, and Iím like, ďWhat are they doing? It looks like they are following me.Ē I turned and stopped, and they turned and rolled down the hill and stopped right at my feet again. I said, "Well, theyíre telling me I donít have anything to be afraid of, but Iím still scared. Iím going to go home and make sure my familyís okay.Ē
Next thing Iím at the house where I was as a child, and a man opens the door ... I think I told you this dream before, I donít know, but Iíve still got to tell it because itís got to be something important to me. It wasnít my house anymore, it was like a rental, and Iím like, ďGee, my goodness, whatís going on?Ē Iím at this house and Iím thinking Iím supposed to be here, but then a meteor falls right at my feet and breaks to pieces Ė not big pieces, some of them are pretty big and some of them are pretty small. I bent down and I started picking up all the pieces of the meteor because they were very important.
There were crystals inside, and theyíre all rosy colored. Theyíre like light rose down to blue, and then they go back to a deep rose as they go deeper into the crystal. I pick up everything I can find, and I said, ďIíve got to get this and keep this, because it is very important.Ē Thatís where the dream ends.
The important thing in the dream, I think, was that I didnít have to be afraid about all of the stuff thatís going on. I know that part, that even though chaos is going to go on I donít have anything to be afraid of really, even though things that are scary might be happening around me or in me that I donít understand, but I donít have to be frightened about it. The second is the crystal. I felt like it was ME Ė you know, not just something outside of me but part of me, and it was very important. What does this crystal ... the crystal is what really fascinates me.
ELIAS: I may express to you, you are correct in your assessment that this dream imagery is concerning movement in this shift in consciousness. In this, you present yourself with these meteors that continue to surround you but are not hurtful to you, for you are expressing a trust within yourself concerning your abilities to be recognizing of them and to not allow them to be affecting of you outside of your objective choices. The meteors are your symbolization to yourself concerning beliefs.
In this, as I have stated, beliefs are not being eliminated in this shift in consciousness; they are being accepted. Therefore they continue to exist, but in the acceptance of them and the acknowledgment of their existence, so to speak, you also discontinue automatic responses in relation to your beliefs and allow yourself freedom to choose concerning your beliefs. In trusting your ability to accomplish this action, what you have created is, in a manner of speaking, the neutralization of them, which you imaged to yourself in the manner that as any of these meteors approaches you, it stops directly before you but is not creating a hurtful or what you may term to be damaging effect in relation to you.
Now; as you also encounter one of these meteors and it opens and you view these crystals within it, this is your imagery to yourself in recognizing that you ARE what has created these beliefs. Therefore you are, in a manner of speaking, symbolically within the center of them. Your association with these crystals, that they were you and therefore important, is quite accurate in translation of this imagery. For, in actuality, this IS the expression of you, to be appreciated in the recognition of it, that although all of these expressions appear to be outside of you, they ARE you. Therefore, you allow yourself imagery to present to yourself the wondrousness of what you are in your symbology.
GEORGIA: Oh, thank you. I just knew, but I didnít get it that way. I just knew it was me.
GEORGIA: I just knew that I had to get it all up and take it with me, because it was me. (Elias chuckles) I found it was a very interesting and involved dream.
Weíre talking about beliefs now, and I know most of us who are involved with you are realizing just how conflicting our beliefs are. We have a very strong belief that every human being is worthy and wonderful and glorious, and then you turn around and you realize that somewhere deep inside you, you know that youíre better than that guy over there, because heís different. (Elias chuckles) You find yourself realizing that that little kernel is there, and itís like, ďI didnít know I believed that!Ē
GEORGIA: Iíve known it so long, and itís like, ďWhere did that come from?Ē
ELIAS: And I may express to you, my friend, this is an aspect of the point of your creation of these mass events, to be emphasizing these aspects of beliefs to each individual, to offer yourselves individually the opportunity to recognize objectively that you indeed DO associate with these beliefs.
GEORGIA: Yes, and Iíve recognized that for a long time. It was a surprise when I found it out, but when I did it was like, ďOh, yeah!Ē Lately Iíve been noticing all kinds of conflicting things inside me. Itís a wonder we can even function! (Elias laughs) Theyíre so hidden usually, and theyíre coming to light now.
GEORGIA: Theyíre out there right for us to look at, and you think, ďOoooh, yuck!Ē because itís not really something you want Ė because you have other beliefs that are stronger that conflict with those, is what Iím trying to say. Itís like Iíd rather have this one, but itís not any better really than this one; theyíre just different.
GEORGIA: Thatís what Iím trying to tell myself; but at the same time I know which ones I like better. (Chuckles)
ELIAS: I am understanding.
GEORGIA: Right! So Iím trying to tell myself itís okay that I felt that way, itís okay to have that belief down inside you. I donít know where it came from, but itís there. I mean, on a conscious level right now I donít know where it came from, but I have it and thatís okay. I just need to realize that itís there and, like the meteor, it doesnít have to affect what I do.
ELIAS: Correct, and this is movement into acceptance.
GEORGIA: Oh, good, I hope so. Iíll be glad when I finally get there, the fact of just knowing that acceptance means that what you believe is okay, and then you have to change it. I know I got a little upset the last time we met when you said, ďWell, you didnít have to make the chair,Ē or words to that effect about I didnít have to reconfigure it, and I was like, ďDamn! I thought I was doing so good!Ē (1) (Laughs)
Then I realized, why am I upset? Itís this thing that we have, we have all these conflicting things going on, and itís okay. But itís just knowing that we can, that people are going to eventually accept it, and that means me. That gives me the courage to keep going and to say I didnít have what I would call a good day today, but thatís okay. Iíve been remembering things that Iíve heard and read and my own experience, and I can say thatís okay, I can keep going, I can get through this and itís not important.
ELIAS: Correct. This is, my friend, actual movement into acceptance, for you are allowing yourself to recognize your choices, your beliefs, the influences expressed in relation to your experiences, and not expressing judgment concerning the expressions of your experiences but merely recognizing that they are your experiences and that they are choices, and [that] you may not express these choices in preference but you have chosen certain expressions and experiences within a particular time framework, and a recognition that you do hold the ability to generate other choices that may be expressions of your preference in another moment, and that it matters not. This is movement into genuine acceptance.
GEORGIA: Oh, thank you! That makes me feel better, because sometimes I do put judgments on them, but then when I realize thatís what Iím doing...
GEORGIA: ...because thatís one of the automatic things we do. (Elias laughs) I tell myself, ďWell, that is being judgmental,Ē and so I try to sit down and look at it. I say, ďThatís okay, you feel bad, and you think itís yucky.Ē I tell myself, too, that itís okay to be judgmental right then.
ELIAS: And I shall incorporate your language in expressing to you, yes, right!
GEORGIA: (Laughing) Good, thank you!
ELIAS: For in this...
GEORGIA: At least Iím beginning to recognize sometimes...
GEORGIA: ...that Iím doing it. When I do it, I say, ďThatís what youíre doing and itís okay, but is what that person did REALLY wrong?Ē And I say no, so Iím telling myself those things...
ELIAS: I am understanding.
GEORGIA: ...and it helps me get through my days better. Iím using the ďbetterĒ in the way that ... I should say that itís more effective. I come out at the end of the day feeling happier.
ELIAS: I am understanding, and be remembering duplicity is also a belief system.
GEORGIA: Oh, Iím in there, I know I am! There are times I donít even realize Iím doing it. But when I do, I feel good because I recognized that moment and I realized what I was doing.
GEORGIA: It feels good that hey, I actually realized what Iím doing here! When weíre here on this side and someone says something that doesnít agree with my beliefs, for instance, I want to jump in and say, ďYouíre wrong.Ē I know theyíre not wrong. I think Iíve stopped most of that, but not all of it. (Elias chuckles)
But I will say, ďI see where youíre coming from.Ē If theyíre someone who has the choice to make right there of what they want to do, I will say Ė and theyíre my boss, for instance Ė I will say, ďI will do what you want the way you want it done, but I want you to know that it will make me feel extremely uncomfortable doing it that way. But thatís okay if thatís what you want, thatís fine, but I will feel really uncomfortable doing it, because this is the way I feel about it.Ē I find that helps me, too, because I get to express my opinion to myself without denigrating their opinion of it. I honestly let them know how I feel about it.
ELIAS: I am understanding.
GEORGIA: Sometimes I want to say, ďOh, youíre wrong,Ē but I know theyíre not because they have a valid opinion, too. Itís just that I like being right! (Elias cracks up) I like being smart, I like having the correct answer! You are always being taught thatís the way to go. But at the same time, Iím beginning to realize now that Iím so old Ė and Iím not immortal Ė that everybody can be right and still have their own answer.
ELIAS: Ha ha ha! Quite correct!
GEORGIA: But I just really wanted to ... because of my husband I was ... the word ďworriedĒ is going on in my head, and I know that I donít have anything to worry about. But thank you for talking with me about it, thank you for helping me get my thoughts out where I could talk about them and my feelings. Because you always do it in such a joyful and positive way, it really helps. Thank you. Iím going to let you go now, unless you have something you want to share.
ELIAS: You are very welcome, my friend. And I express to you an acknowledgment of your movement in relation to recognizing your choices, for this holds great significance in allowing you much more of an expression of freedom. I may express to you, be remembering, worry is one of the expressions that is almost a waste of energy...
GEORGIA: Thank you.
ELIAS: ...for this action does not alter your choices or what you create. It merely reinforces a discounting of yourself in your abilities. Therefore, remind yourself that you are each creating perfectly within the moment in relation to your individual directions.
GEORGIA: Okay, Iíll do that. Thank you.
ELIAS: Very well, my friend. I express, as always, tremendous affection to you and great encouragement in your challenges. Be remembering, be playful!
ELIAS: Very well. I express to you this day in great fondness, au revoir.
Elias departs at 3:07 PM.
© 2001 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.