Friday, February 06, 2004
ďBeliefs about Power and ControlĒ
Participants: Mary (Michael) and Daryl (Ashrah).
Eliasí arrival time is 15 seconds.
ELIAS: Good morning!
ELIAS: (Chuckles) And what shall we be discussing?
DARYL: Well, weíre going to start with little stuff and then we can move on to the scarier stuff.
ELIAS: (Chuckles) Very well.
DARYL: The first thing is my other current focus, Jennifer, that weíve talked about before Ė a few weeks ago, I felt like I was in contact with her and it seemed like she was objectively aware of me. Is that correct?
DARYL: I felt like she was asking me questions. Is that just my translation of her energy, more or less?
ELIAS: That is an accurate translation. As I expressed to you ďsomewhat aware,Ē the individual is aware of an interaction but not of an actual identification of you.
DARYL: I was thinking that she had more of an idea of who I was, but I guess not. Should I just kind of let whatever happens happen and not pursue her in any way, in terms of contact?
ELIAS: It is your choice.
DARYL: I donít want to be invasive.
ELIAS: I may express to you, if the other individual chooses not to participate, you will not be, for the other individual will not allow the interaction.
DARYL: So I donít have to tiptoe so much?
DARYL: I got a name, and I didnít write the first name down right away so Iím not sure how off this is, but it was Achais Kantu, A-C-H-A-I-S Kantu. Is that a focus?
DARYL: Is this a focus from the distant past or something?
DARYL: Is it pre-B.C. kind of past?
DARYL: You want to tell me maybe what country or anything like that? (Pause)
ELIAS: Location that you identify now as Turkey.
ELIAS: And itís a man?
DARYL: Itís kind of interesting to me that all of a sudden Iím getting last names. (Elias chuckles) I think Iíve also created two new future focuses. The first one seems to be at the Alterversity at the same time as my focus Ashrah. The name I got was Rebecca Toussaint.
DARYL: I also got another one whoís at the Alterversity but in the 24th century, named Benjamin Holt.
DARYL: Does he teach at the Alterversity?
DARYL: In terms of describing himself, I think what I understood him to say is that heís an interdimensional cowboy. (Elias chuckles) Is that what he said?
ELIAS: That would be an interpretation, yes. (Laughs)
DARYL: So he spends a lot of time with other dimensions?
DARYL: And the cowboy part, does it kind of mean that he roams around without a home, sort of?
ELIAS: In a manner of speaking, and also somewhat adventurous.
DARYL: One of the things thatís happened with him is that his name seemed very familiar to me, and Iíve told it to some other people and it seems very familiar to them, too. Is there some reason for that?
ELIAS: And your impression?
DARYL: Well, it was something I was going to ask you later, about a thing that my future focuses are doing with me. I think heís quite involved in it.
ELIAS: (Chuckles) Correct.
DARYL: Iíll talk to you about that in a minute, then.
ELIAS: Very well.
DARYL: Somebody referred to me as Ashrah with an ďaĒ in the middle, as ďAsharah,Ē and I wondered if thatís a focus of mine also.
DARYL: Is that a female?
DARYL: And she is also a good deal of time ago?
DARYL: I got a couple of names that I think are 11:11 focuses of mine. The first one is Abacor.
DARYL: And the second one is Jocelyn, with a J.
DARYL: Does it make sense to consider those people male or female, or is gender not a good way to think of it?
ELIAS: You may. It is not entirely accurate, but you may associate within yourself an identification of male or female gender to generate more of a familiarity.
DARYL: I havenít gotten pretty much anything except names. I got a picture, I think, of one of them, but in terms of knowing what they look like or anything, I donít seem to be pulling that in so far. Itís hard to kind of get a handle on that. (Elias chuckles)
In relation to the artist John Singer Sargent, he had a relative of his called Rose-Marie Ormond, and she served as a model for a lot of his work. When I saw her picture, I felt a lot of emotions toward her. That makes me think that either I have a focus who knows her or Iím picking up on someone else, like Iíve done with Oona before. So do I have a focus that knows Rose-Marie Ormond?
ELIAS: Yes, and the latter is also correct.
DARYL: I know that sheís involved there; sheís got a focus that would know Rose-Marie.
DARYL: Is that Polly or Dolly or whoever?
DARYL: Would this be her husband who died, Robert Michel?
DARYL: Thatís who I am?
DARYL: So thatís why I felt such affection for her. In the past, when I was in high school, I knew a guy whose name was John Conner, and I wondered if that was a focus of Connor.
DARYL: Also, thereís someone in entertainment recently whoís called Danny Comden, and I wondered if thatís a focus of Camdon.
DARYL: I wondered if I share 26 focuses with Fontine?
DARYL: I want to ask you some more about observing essences. Am I an observing essence of Frederick Nietzsche?
DARYL: And the musician, Jimmy Dale Gilmore?
DARYL: And Kevin Spacey?
DARYL: I havenít figured out exactly how to tell the difference with those. (Elias chuckles)
A number of years ago I talked to you about D. H. Lawrence and William James, and we talked about them in terms of me having similar perception with Lawrence and the worldview of James. That was before you discussed observing essences. I wondered if I observed those people.
DARYL: Which one? James?
DARYL: Have I got any other action with Lawrence, like counterpart or...?
ELIAS: Briefly, but not presently.
DARYL: I know that itís a bigger subject than just a yes/no, but say with D. H. Lawrence, if I want to be an observing essence with him and Iím not, can I just basically decide I want to do that and then become observing essence?
DARYL: I thought so.
I have a couple of questions for Oona. One is is Isabel McClurg a focus of Allesander?
DARYL: So we still havenít found the one that he is the actual focus. Thatís going to drive him nuts! (Elias chuckles) But thereís still somebody out there whoís just not been identified.
ELIAS: It is a treasure hunt! (Both chuckle)
DARYL: I donít suppose you want to give any clues for the treasure hunt?
ELIAS: (Laughs) I shall leave this to you.
DARYL: She also wanted to know, did Oona and Allesander fragment a new essence last week?
DARYL: Was that just the two of them that did that?
DARYL: She didnít ask me to ask that, but I was wondering. Iíve gotten the names that I believe are Alterversity focuses of some of the people in the Darlings, and I wanted to check.
ELIAS: Very well.
DARYL: The first one is Dennis, a focus of Lucille?
DARYL: Caroline, a focus of Connor?
DARYL: Iím not sure which, Humphrey or Henry a focus of Leland?
DARYL: Henry, okay. Heíll probably like that better than Humphrey. (Elias laughs) Carlos, a focus of Fryolla?
DARYL: And this one seems kind of weird Ė Raswana, a focus of Soloron?
DARYL: And heís at the Alterversity?
DARYL: And these guys are all at the same time as Ashrah and Myr?
DARYL: I wanted to ask the statistics, so to speak, for a couple of friends of Myiishaís that Iíve also met. Myiisha has offered impressions for a lot of the information. The first one is a woman named Andrea, and Iíd like to get her essence name, family, alignment, orientation and focus. Iíll give you the impressions as we go along, but we donít have an impression for the essence name.
ELIAS: Very well. Essence name Alien, A-L-I-E-N (ah LEAN).
DARYL: Myiishaís impression for family is Gramada.
DARYL: Alignment, Sumari?
DARYL: Orientation, soft?
DARYL: I thought that, but I donít know her so well. (Elias chuckles) And focus, political?
DARYL: She had a dream and it was about being presented with a blue ring. Myiisha and I were thinking that that was you being involved in there.
DARYL: That was your introduction?
DARYL: The second individual is called Christine, and essence name for her?
ELIAS: Essence name Kara, K-A-R-A (KAR uh).
DARYL: And Myiishaís impression for family was Sumari.
ELIAS: And alignment?
DARYL: Orientation, soft?
DARYL: And is her focus emotional?
DARYL: She has had experiences with lights dimming and also closing her eyes and seeing stars, and she thought that you were involved with those.
ELIAS: Yes, you are correct.
DARYL: Now I want to talk to you about the thing that happened with my future focuses. My understanding is that thereís now a dozen of them and most of them are involved in an action with me, that I guess I initiated, where I would like them to help me with moving through all this stuff with the Shift. It began with me kind of realizing that. I felt a lot of acceptance coming from them and also help in particular at this time with power beliefs and truths. I got a phrase associated with that that I believe is sort of a trigger method to help hook up, and not just for me but helping other people hook up with their own focuses. That phrase is ďshift assist.Ē Is that all accurate?
DARYL: Is that why people know Benjaminís name?
DARYL: My understanding is that just using that phrase is kind of a like a catalyst, being helpful. Not that it causes anything, but it kind of...
DARYL: And people are hooking up with their own focuses each time. Itís not like people helping each other; itís each person helping themselves.
ELIAS: Correct, in a manner of a focal point.
DARYL: Thatís a good way to put it. Do you have anything else youíd like to say about that? That was kind of a surprise to me.
ELIAS: (Chuckles) But you have been moving in this direction of incorporating interaction with future focuses to be assistants in your movement. Therefore, why shall you be so surprised?
DARYL: I donít know! (Laughs)
ELIAS: That you have accomplished this? (Laughs)
DARYL: Yeah! I guess what Iím really surprised about is that other people are reacting to it. So if I, for instance, wrote about this on the Darlings List, then people could use it if they wanted to?
DARYL: I would assume maybe thereís more to come in the future that I donít know about yet.
ELIAS: In what respect?
DARYL: With this or other assistance for the Shift.
ELIAS: If you are allowing, yes.
DARYL: In terms of starting with that experience, I was aware of power beliefs before; but when I was working with my futures, I really felt more aware of it. Iím finding that my power beliefs are kind of entwined with everything, kind of like duplicity is, that itís a very big area for me. It involves not just physical fear about the proximity but also my interactions with everybody and what I create and what I consider my actual ability to choose. I guess Iíd like any comments that you think would be helpful to me noticing whatís going on in terms of power beliefs and truths.
ELIAS: There is an automatic association that power may be harmful. In this, recognize that power is actually your ability to manipulate energy naturally in any manner. It is not an expression that necessitates fear, for it is evidenced in all that you do, Ashrah, in each of your days.
You express a tremendous power in all that you are generating, but you do not perceive that to be your power. You perceive this idea or this concept of power as being some expression or element that you have not tapped into fully yet or that you have not yet experienced, which is not the situation. It is merely that you are not recognizing the power that you already do express.
I may express to you also that there is one element that is frequently reinforced which does contribute to a fear of your power, which is expressed in your breathing manifestation, for that is one manifestation that you do recognize the powerfulness of.
DARYL: As a manifestation.
ELIAS: Correct, and you do recognize that it is YOUR energy and YOUR power that is manifesting that. That reinforces your fear of your power, for it reinforces the association that power is an expression of uncomfortable manifestations or negative expressions.
DARYL: So you say that I do recognize that the breathing is something that Iím doing?
DARYL: I also feel at the same time like I donít have the power to change it.
ELIAS: I am understanding. You recognize that you are generating this and that you are creating this and that it is a powerful manifestation, but you do not view or perceive that you control it. Your perception is that it is beyond your control.
DARYL: Iím still trying to get a handle on it. I realize that I create it but I donít feel that I control it?
DARYL: As part of my choosing with the breathing, is it basically that I donít feel like I do have the power to choose and do that differently, or am I actually afraid of taking that power?
ELIAS: The latter.
DARYL: Afraid of taking it?
DARYL: And thatís because Iím afraid of power.
ELIAS: Correct. But you incorporate equal measure of power to be generating different manifestations and different choices. It is merely a matter of how you direct your attention and how you manipulate energy. But this involves your association with the belief of control, that in order to be manipulating of energy you must be controlling it.
DARYL: You mean like objectively?
DARYL: And do I have some idea of how I would do that? Is it something Iím trying to achieve, then?
ELIAS: Not necessarily. This is the point, that you express this belief that in order to manipulate energy in specific manners and not be a victim of the energy that you express in manifestations, you must be controlling. But you do not perceive yourself to be in control of what you are manifesting; therefore, it holds the power in association with your perception. It does NOT hold the power Ė ďitĒ being the manifestation Ė but it matters not whether it actually holds the power or not, for this is your perception and therefore it does.
DARYL: The other thing I wanted to talk to you about, or one of the things... Itís all kind of involved in this; I donít know how to separate it out. About a month ago, I felt like I changed my attitude towards myself and was able to start being nicer and kind of regard myself the way I would a friend if they were doing stuff like the breathing stuff. I did feel like a change in me emotionally, which I assume is a result of... Itís not that the emotions are what I changed, but they are feedback on what I changed.
DARYL: Was I basically moving my attention?
ELIAS: Yes, and allowing yourself to express more of a gentleness with yourself.
DARYL: During that time I was able to go to the Castaic group session and be in physical proximity and see a bunch of people that I liked.
DARYL: Which I really enjoyed. I feel like it was significant that I was able to do that, including talking in front of a group of people briefly.
ELIAS: Yes, which was a significant movement in association with exposure.
DARYL: Thatís what I thought. I was kind of surprised when I felt the desire to do that. (Elias chuckles) After I got back from Castaic, that night I had an experience where I felt like I moved through the door of the energy block and that there was nothing between me and reality. Was that essentially what happened?
ELIAS: In a manner of speaking, yes.
DARYL: Is there another way to express what happened?
ELIAS: This is your interpretation, but it is somewhat accurate.
Now; recognize that this is not an absolute, that it is not an action that you incorporate once and thusly are done. For remember, it is a process of continuously reinforcing yourself, allowing yourself to trust yourself and be gentle with yourself, for you lean in a direction of expression quite often of expressing harshness with yourself and creating expectations and expressing disappointment.
DARYL: For about ten days my breathing stuff then went away, and I was quite happy. When I had the experience with my future focuses, I briefly had it but I knew I was dealing with some fear around that. But again in the past week itís come back twice, especially in the past couple days. I could tell that Iíd lost that ability to treat myself better, because I canít feel it anymore. I felt it somewhat this morning but not for the past couple days. So I guess I want to discuss more about why exactly Iím doing that right now, today, why Iím having trouble with my breathing today. I assume that I still am in the circle you talked about...
DARYL: ...and I want to understand more than I do about the circle and how to break that pattern, because I obviously donít understand it well enough to get out of it so far. Iím feeling pretty frustrated in that area.
ELIAS: It is a matter of recognizing, Ashrah, the expression of being gentle with yourself and allowing yourself to relax your energy, and in this, noticing these moments in which you are expressing this harshness and the suspicion that is associated with the lack of control. For if you are not expressing control and if you do not perceive that you incorporate control, you express this harshness with yourself once again.
Notice in those moments and express to yourself in those moments that it is not a question of control, it is a matter of allowance, and to express that gentleness with yourself, as you have stated, as you would with other individuals.
DARYL: Once I get to that point then it seems very difficult to change course, even though Iím aware of whatís happening.
ELIAS: I am understanding, and this is the reason that I am expressing to you this suggestion that once you notice what you are expressing, allow yourself to remember that this is not concerning control and allow yourself a gentleness with yourself. Therefore, you shall incorporate more of a relaxing.
DARYL: One of the other things Iíve noticed with this is sometimes, well, a lot of times, when it starts I have fear and my breathing is affected. But a lot of times it seems like the fear stops and it even seems like Iíve gotten a message from the fear, but the breathing continues onward. I guess Iím kind of confused about why the breathing is continuing if I feel like the fear has stopped.
ELIAS: For this is the element that is associated with the perception of control. This is the reason that I am identifying this with you, for this is a strong belief, that you must be objectively in control of your energy to be manipulating it in a specific manner.
DARYL: Thatís what I try to do then, too, right, is take objective control of it?
DARYL: Probably makes everything worse.
ELIAS: As you are aware, it does not accomplish what you want.
DARYL: So I need to go in the opposite direction of just allowing...
DARYL: ...and letting go. So if Iím having more of an emphasis on the breathing part rather than the fear part, then itís probably a control issue.
DARYL: I feel part of it is really a genuine reaction to fear, that thatís the main component at those times.
ELIAS: That is a component, but it is not the only factor.
DARYL: So controlís also in there.
ELIAS: Yes. For this has become a very familiar manifestation, and you have generated a strong association that you incorporate no control in association with it and therefore you are helpless to be choosing any other expression. (Pause)
DARYL: Part of my frustration also is that I keep choosing this as an expression for various things, and I feel like it is not really an effective way to communicate with myself, to use it all the time instead of other ways Ė not to mention I find it unpleasant. Also in terms of understanding myself, I feel like itís not efficient.
ELIAS: I am understanding what you are expressing. But as in association with yourself, many individuals generate a perpetuation of certain uncomfortable physical manifestations, for they are familiar, and the individual, such as yourself, generates an underlying suspicion that they do not incorporate the ability to choose otherwise. That also is associated with being in control of what you express objectively.
DARYL: I know that I tend to start struggling with my beliefs, like this belief that I donít have control over this, and then I try to convince myself that I do. But my understanding is that Iíd be better off to just accept that I believe I donít have control.
ELIAS: Correct. Struggling with the expressed belief merely reinforces it and holds your attention upon it, and therefore offers more energy to its strength.
DARYL: I noticed that also with the truth we discussed last time, about expressing myself. I consider it kind of an unreasonable belief. I try to convince myself that I can express myself and no harm will come to me, but then I just end up getting lost in that, instead of just saying ďokay, I believe thatĒ and letting it go.
Now; this is an expression that is incorporated quite frequently with many individuals. It is an automatic action to attempt to eliminate. In attempting to express to yourself that you do not believe this or that you shall change this belief through thought does not accomplish the desired action, for thought is not creating any action of creating.
In this, as you continue to move your attention to thought and incorporating that in a manner as if it is a communication rather than a translating mechanism, you merely convolute yourself. You do not accomplish the desired action, and what you do accomplish is to be reinforcing the strength of the expressed belief.
It is not a matter of eliminating the expressed belief but recognizing in your acceptance of it that it is not limited to one expression or one influence. Every belief incorporates many, many different expressions and influences, and this is wherein your freedom lies. For in recognizing that each belief incorporates many different influences and expressions, you incorporate the freedom to choose which influences you concentrate upon, rather than generating the automatic responses.
DARYL: So like with the power beliefs, I could choose different power beliefs in terms of the power feels good or allows great freedom or whatever.
ELIAS: It is not choosing a different belief, Ashrah. You incorporate a belief concerning power, or several beliefs concerning power.
Now; that one belief may be perceived in many different manners. It incorporates MANY different expressions, some of which you may prefer and some of which you may not, some of which you may appreciate and some of which may trigger fear. But you may choose which influences, which expressions of the belief that you focus your attention upon. It is not a matter of incorporating one belief that expresses that power is always bad or destructive and another belief that power is good and productive; it is the same belief. There are merely different influences and expressions of the same belief, and it is your choice as to which influences and which expressions of the belief you focus your attention upon and you concentrate upon.
As any influence or expression of a belief becomes familiar, you express it more automatically. This is the reason that you incorporate the same manifestation repeatedly, for it becomes automatic. It has become familiar; you have concentrated attention with it. Therefore, in that familiarity, it becomes automatic and you do not view any other choices.
DARYL: In terms of exposure and intimacy and physical proximity, I wanted to kind of relate it to this. I got in touch with my friend Silva, who lives here, after I got back, but essentially nothingís happening with that and Iím not creating that. Is that through some kind of fear on my part, or is that because in some sense our energy doesnít match in a way that I want to draw that in?
ELIAS: Both Ė although the fear is not as great as it has been expressed pastly.
DARYL: So it could be that I donít really want to do that much with her?
ELIAS: Not in the category that you have automatically associated with.
ELIAS: Not in your category of specific types of relationships in specific expressions of intimacy. This is not to say that you do not want to generate an interaction and a relationship with this individual, but not necessarily in the capacity of intimacy in relation to romantic...
DARYL: Well, yeah, because I donít want anything romantic.
DARYL: I was thinking that we could be friends, but that doesnít seem to be happening.
ELIAS: And that is associated with your allowance of yourself to be open and exposed.
DARYL: So itís because I donít want to expose myself, basically.
DARYL: In terms of that, Iíve also thought about trying to pursue something through the ads or something, but before I wasnít allowing it to happen. I guess Iím kind of confused about where I am in terms of exposure and intimacy and what the best way to do is. The breathing stuff is also involved, because if Iím doing that I feel self-conscious, and I donít know if I can go through with something if I do plan to meet somebody.
ELIAS: I am understanding. Focus your attention upon yourself and allow yourself to be evaluating these beliefs that we have discussed this day, offering yourself practice in being more gentle with yourself and interrupting that harshness and rigidness that you express with yourself.
In this, I may also suggest to you that you catch yourself, so to speak, in moments in which you notice that you are generating automatic associations in relation to past experiences, generating them into a doubt and a fear and a skepticism in relation to what you might be creating now. Are you understanding?
ELIAS: This is an action that is also familiar to you and that you generate quite frequently. You express certain experiences and they become past associations that you anticipate in the present and futurely, and that generates a shield that you create in expecting similar outcomes.
DARYL: If Iím doing that and paying attention and also continuing to go out to some extent and expose myself, like just hanging out places, that would also continue to help my movement through this?
DARYL: The winter is going to be ending soon and it will be nicer to be out in public places.
ELIAS: I am understanding. Also remember to incorporate in that gentleness with yourself more of a perception incorporating playfulness. You incorporate excessive time framework of seriousness.
DARYL: I would agree with that!
ELIAS: Remember, this is a game. Your entire manifestation is a game.
DARYL: But again, when I get the breathing stuff it all becomes very serious and I donít feel playful at all.
ELIAS: I am understanding. But the more familiar you become with playfulness, the easier you shall express it and the less you shall express this seriousness, which is a contributant to this circle.
DARYL: With my action in my shift assist thing, is it useful to call upon them to help me with that?
ELIAS: If you are so choosing.
DARYL: Because they would have an understanding enough of whatís going on, like in my patterns?
DARYL: Do you have anything else you want to add to that particular subject about exposure? I did feel today that I was really scared of talking with you and feeling exposed before the session. Then I felt you communicating with me and I felt like maybe there was some kind of exposure I wanted to accomplish with you during the session.
ELIAS: Which you have.
DARYL: I have, okay. I thought maybe I had.
ELIAS: Which also is evident in your energy.
DARYL: Yeah, I feel different than I did before.
ELIAS: Correct, and it is also evident in somewhat your breathing.
DARYL: Thatís something I can also do with you outside of the session.
ELIAS: Yes, you may. My energy is always available to you and I am always expressing a supportiveness with you.
DARYL: Thatís another thing. I know youíre there, but I donít allow myself to feel you sometimes. But if I could feel like I was doing the exposure thing with you when Iím in what I consider a safe place, I think that would be good.
ELIAS: I am always available, my friend.
DARYL: Lastly, in terms of the lump which I still have Ė which has been hurting significantly in the last week Ė again, Iím afraid if I think about that, itís just lending more energy to it because I know my attention is still on it. The one thing Iíve noticed is I feel like itís shifted physically a little bit this week and that Iím bringing a little playfulness into it or something by moving it around. (Elias chuckles) Is that accurate?
ELIAS: Yes, and this I am acknowledging of. Perhaps incorporate your inner landscape, and that may be expressing somewhat more playfulness also.
DARYL: As you probably know, I just transcribed a tape about the inner landscape exercise. Iíd like to talk to you more about that at a future time.
ELIAS: Very well.
DARYL: In the inner landscape, since Iím very involved with having deer close to me would they be an appropriate creature to bring in to eat some stuff, which is what theyíre doing in my backyard anyway?
ELIAS: Yes. That may be incorporating of a more playful expression to be dissipating the manifestation.
DARYL: I also think that the deer are an expression of exposure to me.
ELIAS: Yes. In your practicing with that inner landscape, perhaps you may become familiar with it and comfortable, and even incorporate that in association with your breathing if you are so choosing, which may be another method to practice being more playful.
DARYL: That hadnít really occurred to me. (Elias chuckles) I can just kind of see what images present themselves through my imagination, like in terms of breathing, rather than constructing the scene?
DARYL: And that would be more allowing.
ELIAS: Correct. (Chuckles)
DARYL: Well, weíre pretty much out of time, so...
ELIAS: Very well. Remember, Ashrah, I am with you continuously and you may be interactive with my energy in any moment. I am always offering an energy of helpfulness.
DARYL: I appreciate it very much.
ELIAS: I express to you, as I always express, my genuine and tremendous affection. And I say to you, my friend, in great fondness, au revoir.
DARYL: Au revoir.
Elias departs after 59 minutes.
© 2004 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.