Thursday, June 02, 2005
ďTrust in SelfĒ
Participants: Mary (Michael) and Anonymous.
(Eliasí arrival time is 16 seconds.)
ELIAS: Good day!
ELIAS: Ha ha! What shall we discuss?
ANON: What shall we discuss Ė well, I have a few things. Actually, I met a new friend and she just got introduced to your material. She would like to know her stats. Her name is Munraj, and if we could get her family and alignment, her orientation, her essence name, her focus type and her number of focuses.
ELIAS: Essence name, Louisa, L-O-U-I-S-A. And your impression as to essence families?
ANON: I just got an email from her last night, so I havenít really done anything. Her impression is that sheís Vold somewhere.
ELIAS: Alignment; family, Sumari.
ANON: Thatís cool. Iíd say she is emotional.
ANON: And I donít know, Iím getting common or soft. I donít know which one.
ANON: I donít know her number of focuses.
ELIAS: Numbering of focuses, 931.
ANON: Also, Lynda made a comment to me in New Orleans that she thinks that Mary and I are counterparts. Is that true?
ANON: I guess I can ask Mary what a counterpart is, because Iím not really sure. Weíre just sharing experiences, is that...? Iíll ask her; donít worry about that.
ELIAS: Very well.
ANON: Thereís lots going on with me. Iíve been really working with what you said in my last session about allowing other peopleís energy into me. I still feel a little bit uncomfortable, if I perceive someoneís energy to be negative or hostile towards me, of just relaxing and allowing that through. Is that just a matter of me trusting that I will configure that energy to my highest good?
ELIAS: In a manner of speaking, yes.
ANON: Am I allowing it to go through, or are there ways that I can be more efficient in that?
ELIAS: You are, to an extent. In the moments that you experience or notice that you are experiencing a hesitation or an automatic response in relation to other individuals, you may allow yourself to stop and relax, not necessarily generate an evaluation of what you are doing in that moment, but merely allow yourself to relax and be aware of allowing the other individualís energy, not holding to it.
ANON: So just keep practicing. I am practicing doing that. It is a process for me, so I am becoming more and more aware of when I am holding energy and when Iím...
ELIAS: I am aware. In this, in those moments, perhaps you may engage a bit of playfulness. For as you recognize another individualís energy that may be threatening or uncomfortable, you may, perhaps, engage a playful activity of visualizing their energy as a ball that they are throwing to you, but you shall not catch. Allow the ball to be thrown but watch the ball move past you.
ANON: So, I actually donít let it flow through me, then.
ELIAS: You are. This is merely a type of visualization that you can engage in a playful manner, which represents you not catching the ball and holding it.
ANON: Oh, I see, not catching the ball. When I notice it, for example, what Iím doing is I actually stop and I breathe, and I breathe in deeply. Itís almost as if Iím breathing in their energy just to let it go through me.
ELIAS: Which also is an action that initiates an immediate relaxation.
ANON: So thatís effective? Iím not holding the energy when Iím doing that?
ANON: So, balls and breathing, thatís terrific. Now, can we get right to the point of a couple of things? One of the things Iíve experienced, on May 10 I was working with energy and so on, and I was understanding about my energy and connecting with a partnerís energy, which you and I talked about before. I felt totally filled with a strong energy myself, and I felt like this projection came out of my heart chakra and went somewhere and connected with another person. It was such a strong feeling, like a magnetic pull. As I was just kind of sitting with it and allowing it, it felt like that personís energy was coming into me.
I could tell that it wasnít my energy, though. It was someone elseís energy, but I was very comfortable with it, and it was almost like I was attuning to it. My impression was that I actually selected my partner energetically somewhere and that I was attuning to his energy, as I think he was sharing his energy with me or supporting it or whatever. Is that what happened? Or if not, can you help me with that?
ELIAS: Yes, that is what you were doing, but not in as absolute of an expression as you are perceiving it. It is a projection of energy that you allowed yourself to also receive a response from of a potential partner.
ANON: Is it a real person or no?
ELIAS: Yes, but it is one potential. What I am expressing to you is that there are several potentials. You have allowed yourself to connect with one. You can continue with that one and eventually draw that individual to you physically, or you may choose to be experimenting with others, also.
ANON: Where am I making that decision? This one feels comfortable, but Iím not sure... I donít want to get into the how of it. I just kind of feel very comfortable. I feel like one of my next steps is to engage in a relationship, for a number of reasons: itís my preference, and itís not like I feel there is a lack in my life. If I am projecting, please let me know, because itís not what I feel that I am doing. But there are a lot of things that I want to experience that I see as being more compatible doing with a partner. Iím just not sure why I would need to equivocate on who that partner is. If one works, why would I choose other people? At what level am I making that decision?
ELIAS: You are misunderstanding what I am expressing to you. You have generated a projection, and in that projection, you have actually generated a connection with another individual and that individual has responded in a projection of energy to you also, and that is a potential. It is an actual individual within your physical reality, and it is a potential that you may pursue and that you may actually create within your physical reality. I am merely expressing to you that you also incorporate other potentials if you are so choosing. You are projecting energy. In a manner of speaking, you created a hit.
ANON: (Laughs) Okay!
ELIAS: And in that action, it was experienced and responded to. But you are projecting energy that is projecting in a wider spanse than merely one individual. If you choose to pursue this one individual, that is a choice. It is not that you are presenting other individuals to yourself. It is that you are projecting energy that is creating a type of beacon, so to speak, that several other energies may be attracted to.
ANON: So, itís not about me attaching to this one person, then.
ELIAS: Or it can be. It is your choice.
ANON: Iím not making that choice with my head.
ANON: What Iím doing is Iím loosening or softening into my preferences of what I would like in a partner, and that is, in turn, projecting out there, and thatís what Iím drawing to myself.
ANON: Thatís the way I choose, is that right? Sometimes I need to admit that I get very rigid or very obsessed with making sure that Iíve included all the things that I want in a partner, in my preferences. Thatís not necessary for me to do, is it?
ANON: I know what I want, and that will be drawn to me, and I can ask for whatever it is. I want to admit that one of the things I would like is for this person to be comfortable with money and have wealth as well. I feel like part of me is being very shallow with that.
ELIAS: That is a preference. What you want is an individual that shall be a complement to you. In that simplicity, allow yourself to draw that to yourself. ANON: So, donít worry about all the other, like that I would betray myself and pull somebody with... Okay.
ELIAS: No, for you are projecting your energy, and in appreciation of your energy and of yourself, you shall draw to you an individual that is a complement. Therefore, what I am expressing to you is not to be complicating.
ANON: Iím noticing a lot, lately, how much I do, and Iím really trying to simplify. One of the things that I noticed in actually connecting so strongly with that personís energy was that the energy that came back to me was this unconditional love and warmth and kindness. It was so interesting for me, first of all, to recognize how another personís energy merged with mine, but that I was still very clear on what my energy was and very clear on the other personís, like how we were merging. But at the same time, it brought up how uncomfortable I was with unconditionally receiving this unconditional love, and I went through about a week of adjusting.
ELIAS: For it is unfamiliar. (Long pause, and the telephone connection is cut off. Connection is resumed after a few minutes.)
ANON: Yes! What happened? (Elias laughs) It was a good part! Iím not sure where we got cut off, but what I was saying was that the energy that got sent back to me felt very much like unconditional love, and it took me about a week to actually adjust to receiving that energy. I think thatís why I went out and got that, like why I invited that experience?
ELIAS: For it is unfamiliar, and this is a manner in which you may allow yourself to familiarize yourself with that type of interaction.
ANON: So that when this person does show up or when I do create him showing up, I wonít discount him or not be able to receive...?
ELIAS: Yes, it is an action of practicing in becoming familiar with an energy and an interaction that is unfamiliar to you, which allows you to more easily accept that.
ANON: Am I closer now to manifesting that? Or do I still need to do work on that or...?
ELIAS: Merely allow. Yes, you are moving closer to generating that type of manifestation within your focus. The important element is to allow yourself to relax and allow and generate the simplicity, and not complicate.
ANON: So, Iím still complicating, then, am I?
ELIAS: Somewhat, in your criteria of what you want. Remember that focusing upon your complement is enough.
ANON: And I know what that is. On a fundamental level, I know what that is.
ANON: Thatís great. Last week I was experiencing such severe body aches and pains, and I still am a little bit, and I wanted to talk to you about that briefly. What Iím thinking is that I am now becoming more grounded or more committed to physical manifestation. I know I was before, but I tended to kind of leave my body a lot. I actually had an experience of feeling like I was sliding into my body one morning, and it feeling so cozy, which I never had before. But Iíve been experiencing severe pains, like through my abdomen. Iíve been kind of practicing allowing the energy to flow through me, and eventually it subsides. Can you give me some insight into what I am creating here?
ELIAS: Yes. When you generate this type of manifestation, you are offering yourself an indication of holding to your energy, and generating tension in association with anticipated events. Your energy is focused upon anticipated actions or performances or events that you shall be engaging, but you are generating tension within your physical body consciousness in relation to those anticipations.
If you allow yourself to relax and be present in the now and recognize that this is associated with anticipation, you may be dissipating it much more quickly and easily, and perhaps even merely generating that type of experience for a moment, as you become more familiar with the automatic association of anticipation that is attached to the manifestation.
ANON: Last week, when I was doing a proposal, I felt like I was two people. My creativity and everything was working beautifully, but at the same time, I was completely abusive to myself and closing down. My whole body closed down, actually. I felt like it did. After that, thatís when I started experiencing the pains. It was almost like my body was trying to get rid of all of that stress.
ELIAS: Yes, for what you are doing is holding very tightly to your energy in association with anticipation, which creates a significant element of tension within your physical body consciousness.
ANON: But this time I didnít allow it to interfere with my creativity, which I always did before. So that was very interesting.
ELIAS: Now you may move into a balance.
ANON: Before I go off the body, though, I have this thing with my left kidney and my hip, and Iím just wondering if thereís anything... First of all, am I creating a terminal illness in my body, or am I just learning about being in my body?
ELIAS: The latter.
ANON: My kidney, I felt like it had a lot of information for me, so I actually listened to it. Is that reasonable, to be listening to our body parts? (Laughs)
ANON: But it still seems to act up and my left hip as well. Are they together in what they are doing or...?
ELIAS: And what is YOUR impression?
ANON: I feel like theyíre separate.
ELIAS: You are correct.
ANON: My kidney has to do with holding on to other people, like responsibilities of other people or something.
ANON: My hip has to do with holding on to body things like weight and things to punish me. Those are just fast impressions. I havenít really sat with it too much.
ELIAS: Partially. And in this, also, your hip is also associated with pressure, pressure that you express with yourself pressure to perform or to accomplish.
ANON: I really wanted to talk with you today, because I know I am doing it and I want to work through it with you. So, my kidney, itís about letting things flow more.
ANON: Is it just with people or with everything?
ELIAS: More strongly with other individuals but also with your environment.
ANON: This is more to do with my family, isnít it?
ANON: I feel terrific at how much Iím learning about the information and creating my reality. I created two weeks here for myself to listen to my information and to study to write final exams. Mary and I talked extensively about this before. However, I am going into old patterns. I recognize that Iím doing it, and Iím not clear how to shift it.
I feel like I am, again, two people. Iíll just briefly say that I am, in this whole process, Iím paying attention, and I think I am trying to be present when Iím sitting and studying. I went for a walk and I had a feeling of integration, not final but an integration between my capabilities and my creativity and my heart energy, my being a very loving person and combining of all that. I just felt completely not like I had to be one or the other in any situation but I could be both. I could be loving and capable, and I could be at the same time creative.
ELIAS: Yes, for this is you. These are qualities of you.
ANON: But Iíve always been either capable, where Iíve been stern and serious, or Iíve been loving. I havenít really combined the two, but I felt it, the mergence of them. I just felt like I integrated some parts of myself then. I have felt so excited about it, because it felt natural to live in all of those capabilities and aspects of myself.
The next day, I was walking, and I was really worried about time, to finish reading the material for the exam and understand the material. I had this image of my mind, of one of the aspects of me, being very competent and so on, and instead of the material being two-dimensional and very linear where I had to pick one point and then try to follow it down a path to get to the information I wanted, I had this image of my mind creating the material in a three-dimensional matrix where I could go into any of these buildings that I had created and get the exact information I wanted without following a linear path. I could also see the interconnection between all of these pieces in this, and it could be in any situation. It didnít have to be just for writing the exam. It looked like I was completely connected with this material in all of its depth and breadth, and that scared the heck out of me.
ELIAS: And what generated the fear?
ANON: Well, because I have four days now to finish studying for this exam. My method of studying has always been to understand the material, memorize what you had to memorize, and this was a very linear way of thinking in order to recall it. But this way is very different. Itís a different way of functioning, of recall, and it precludes, almost, the way Iíve been studying before. Itís saying that when I read the material, I already have all this information, and I donít need to reread it and test myself and do all the things that Iíve always done before.
ELIAS: Perhaps generate your own experimentation. Generate a game with yourself to validate to yourself your ability to accomplish. This is also what is associated with your physical manifestations, this anticipation that I expressed to you, anticipation of expressions and events and productivity and doubting whether you can accomplish if you are trusting yourself. In a manner of speaking, your fear arises in association with not objectively knowing whether trusting yourself will allow you to accomplish, and generating a skepticism in relation to trust itself.
ANON: Yes! Very much.
ELIAS: For the trust is, within your perception, not solid. It is not an absolute. Trusting in your perception does not generate a guarantee. Therefore, that generates the skepticism in association with the action of trusting. It is an unfamiliar expression to you, and therefore, you generate skepticism and it also appears to you to be somewhat elusive Ė it is not an absolute; it is not a guaranteed action. Therefore, you generate this struggle in trusting trust.
ANON: Yes, I do. I feel like Iím jumping off a cliff, like the new wayís showing me how I have this information, and in doing my studies, I connected to the energy of the people who wrote the book, all of that, even the energy of the material itself. I felt that I was doing that, literally, and that this new way of trusting, it actually precludes the old way of studying, because the old way of studying is based on testing myself and doubting myself and constantly, constantly testing. This new way is... Itís almost like my mind is confused. Itís like, look, you wanted a new way of integrating on your solid foundation of capabilities and love, and Iím showing you this way of participating, and yet youíre bringing in all of the doubts now.
ELIAS: Correct, for it is unfamiliar, and you are not accustomed to trusting trust.
Now; this is the reason that I offer the suggestion that you engage an experiment with yourself Ė not necessarily with that information but with any other action or information. In that experimentation, you are not testing yourself, but allowing yourself to experiment and validate that you can trust your own trust.
ANON: I did that up to leading to this. In trivial stuff, like I saw people in a movie and I knew Iíd seen them before. Before, I would just focus my mind and think and think and think, and eventually Iíd come up with the answer. But instead of doing it that way, I thought you know what, Iím not going to do it that way, Iím just going to allow that I know that information and it will come to me. And it did. Iím able to do that.
ANON: If the stakes werenít very high. Right?
ELIAS: It matters not. It is the same action. Do not allow yourself to complicate the action merely that you view this anticipated experience to be bigger or more significant. It is not more significant, for what is significant is that you are allowing yourself to actually engage this action, that you do incorporate the information and that you can access that information, and that it does not require continuous testing and doubting. You can accomplish as easily with your examination as you have with your characters in movies.
ANON: Thereís a big part of me that knows that, that feels that.
ELIAS: But what you are doing in complicating is holding to your energy and doubting. That is what the complication is. In that, you are also generating physical manifestations. They are all connected. Therefore, in allowing yourself to relax and not express that doubt and continue to reinforce what you have already experimented with and what you have already validated, acknowledge what you have already accomplished.
This is a significant point with you, my friend, and we have discussed this many times, for this is what you generate in forgetfulness. I continue to express to you to acknowledge what you already have accomplished, to appreciate what you are doing, what you are accomplishing, what you have accomplished. Temporarily you implement that, and subsequently, you forget and you reinitiate familiar responses, which is to be anticipating. Once you move into the anticipation, you begin to generate other familiar responses, which is doubt and skepticism. Whereas, if you remind yourself to appreciate and acknowledge what you HAVE accomplished and what you ARE accomplishing, that reinforces you and dissipates that skepticism in association with trust. Do not compare. Comparing one action to another action accomplishes what?
ELIAS: Discounting yourself. Can you view how you are comparing in this situation rather than acknowledging your accomplishment of accessing information easily and without study and without incorporating tremendous thought exercises, and comparing that rather than acknowledging it with the anticipated action of your examination: ďYes, I accomplished successfully in this action, Elias, but that was a mundane action and of no consequence.Ē Therefore, rather than acknowledging your accomplishment, you compare that with what you perceive to be the larger expression, which is the examination Ė your ability may be successful in actions that you perceive to be small, but shall you actually perform successfully in an action that you perceive to be large?
ANON: Yes, I see how I am doing that. As we are talking, I realize that I also engaged that action when I was doing the proposal, which I put huge pressure and thatís when I was the two parts of me. But Ėand I recognize that Iím saying ďbutĒ in a discounting manner Ė when I look at that, I go that was a very creative process, and Iím comparing it to the examination where they are looking for exact lists of things for me to remember in order. Thatís how I negate... Like, Iíve already done it that way, Iíve already been creative and have access to the information intuitively in that process, but Iím again discounting it in writing this exam.
ELIAS: Correct, and the more that you anticipate, the more that you concentrate your energy and your attention upon that anticipation, the more you generate obstacles.
ANON: So, Iím anticipating that it will be hard or that I wonít do it?
ELIAS: Not necessarily, but you are doubting your ability to generate successfully if you continue to allow yourself to trust yourself. That is what I am expressing to you. You do not trust the trust.
ANON: There are two pieces that keep coming up in that. Sometimes I really do trust it, and itís fine. Other times I donít, and this is whatís kind of driving me a little bit crazy right now. I feel like I need to commit to the trust. I want to commit to it, but all these other things, the large barking dog is still... Because it is very familiar to me.
ANON: So, there are two pieces that come. One is the pressure of performance and failure. I think the worst thing that can happen in doing this experiment of trusting myself with this information is that I fail the exam. Iíve never failed an exam in my life, not that Iím aware of, anyway, but... (Elias chuckles) Do I need that experience to make me humble, as my friend says, so can I just...?
ELIAS: No. But this, also, is an exercise in trust, in acknowledgment and trust. As you have expressed yourself, you have NOT failed an examination. Therefore, the potential for you to fail this examination is quite small.
ANON: Iíve always studied for other examinations, though.
ELIAS: But you have with this, also Ė merely in a different manner.
ANON: That brings up the other piece. Iím not clear in this way how to participate. When I read the material, Iím understanding it when Iím reading it. How much should I study to keep reinforcing that I know the material? Iím just not clear on my participation level with this. What Iím hearing you say is I could just sit there and be open to the energy of the books and Iíll have that information. If I trusted, if I really, really trusted my trust...
ELIAS: You could.
ANON: ...that would happen. Itís not probable because Iím not quite there, yet.
ELIAS: Correct. But in allowing yourself to incorporate the information and not continuously repeat and recheck and retest yourself, merely allowing yourself to engage the information and move through that body of information, allow yourself the trust that you are assimilating it as you are engaging it, and that it is not necessary to be reincorporating it, rechecking it, retesting yourself repeatedly, but trusting that all that you have engaged is assimilated and is available.
ANON: Even now, if I make that realization and allow from today on, I have three more modules to read. Do I need to go back and read the rest of it again, to engage it that way, or have I already engaged it?
ELIAS: What you have already engaged, you have already assimilated.
ANON: I have the information, donít I?
ELIAS: Yes. Therefore, what I am expressing to you is that it is unnecessary to reengage it and to repeat and to repeat.
ANON: So, literally, I could just finish reading it just one time and then go and write the exam, and in my trust of myself, I can successfully accomplish that exam?
ELIAS: Yes, or you can engage your familiar pattern and successfully engage your examination in that manner. They are merely choices. One is uncomfortable, for you do not wish to be generating that tension and pressure and forcing your energy. The other is uncomfortable, for you are skeptical and do not trust your own trust.
ANON: (Laughing) Iím just gonna be uncomfortable!
ELIAS: Temporarily. (Laughs)
ANON: You know what Iím uncomfortable with is effortless.
ELIAS: I am aware.
ANON: The idea of me just sitting there and joyfully reading that information and having that be in me and me being able to playfully engage that when writing the exam, for some reason...
ELIAS: And not struggling and not working and not striving and not pushing! Oh my! (Both laugh)
ANON: So, if Iím really brave Ė Iíll call it brave...
ELIAS: Very well.
ANON: ...because I have anxiety here Ė I would just enjoy reading the rest of the modules and then go into my garden for the weekend or engage whatever I want, and then go and write that exam on Monday.
ELIAS: Ah, and I would be acknowledging of you. That would be quite brave of you. (Laughs)
ANON: Is it a probable if I would do that, though, or do I need to take this in increments? I recognize that I donít shift overnight. Sometimes I...
ELIAS: (Laughs) Is it probable that you would engage that action? Perhaps not to the extent that you are thinking in this present now, but perhaps you may allow yourself some action of enjoyment within your garden in this time framework prior to your examination, which may be actually beneficial, for that may allow you to relax.
ANON: The pressure that Iím putting on myself right now is that I need to finish reading the next three modules. Iím bringing it down to something literal, because this is a fascinating process for me to recognize how I do put pressure on myself. I donít just do it with exams, although this brings it out in very clear terms. I do it everywhere. That I could finish reading the next three and I then go write my exams Ė forget about the joy that I could just accomplish in that. What Iím thinking that I need to do, though, is do that and then reread the material again, highlighting and trying to remember the lists and things like that.
ELIAS: This would be a choice, and as I have expressed to you, it is a very strong potential that you shall engage your examination and shall be successful whichever direction you choose. I may pose the question to you: which shall you choose? It is not necessary to reread and highlight. You can, for that is a choice.
ANON: Elias! I highlighted everything in blue all the way along! (Both laugh)
ELIAS: Ah! There is an interesting justification for continuing in familiar patterns!
ANON: It was Elias-blue, too! It was great! (Both laugh) Sorry, I interrupted you; go on.
ELIAS: This is quite acceptable. I may express to you, my friend, it is merely a choice. In this present now, you may allow yourself somewhat of less tension or pushing if you are engaging the material and trusting your assimilation of it and not reincorporating it. But I may express to you, quite realistically, being aware of your energy and your direction in this now, that, as I have stated, either choice shall be expressed with some discomfort for different reasons.
One shall be pushing yourself; the other shall be anticipating and worrying, neither of which is comfortable within your experience. But it is a matter of what you want to experience, and it is, also, a matter of when you want to experience. For if you choose not to engage this new method in association with this one examination, that is not to say that all is lost and that you have not accomplished or that you have moved backward, for you shall present yourself with other opportunities to engage this new method of assimilating information in more of an ease.
ANON: The final exam is August.
ELIAS: It may be a matter of practice. I am not expressing to you an advocation of either choice. It is your choice, and in this, whatever you perceive to express less conflict and less stressfulness and less pushing of your energy or less discounting of yourself, that would be the choice that I would advocate. But that is for you to choose. If you want to engage this new method of assimilating information and practice trusting yourself, I am acknowledging that you do incorporate the ability to generate successfulness with that method.
ANON: Starting with this examination?
ELIAS: Yes, but it is your choice. If that is not as comfortable to you as reincorporating the information, it is unnecessary to force yourself in either choice.
ANON: Very interesting. Iíve created a pressure on myself, regardless, because physically there isnít enough time for me to reincorporate all the information. Iím acknowledging of my accomplishments before, that if I ended up with that much pressure, I would have just not written the exam, but Iím going to write this exam, and I feel very determined to pass the exam. I canít engage the old way a hundred percent, because physically, in my perception, there isnít enough time to do the old method.
ELIAS: Therefore, you have efficiently moved yourself into a scenario in which, in your perception, you shall force yourself to engage this new method.
ANON: Well, I can still go crazy over the next four days and push as much as I want, reincorporating the energy. Or I can just allow it, I can go a hundred percent all the way into the new, and just allow that Iíve already done it. (Elias laughs) Thatís my choice at this point, I think.
ELIAS: Interesting challenge, and we shall see what you shall choose.
ANON: I am so excited about it, because I feel like I have been at odds with my mind in this whole process of listening to my own internal information. Iím realizing that my creativity doesnít come from so specifically focusing my mind, that it has all the information or that it has to figure everything out. My whole being has all of the information, and when I need that information, my mind will have access to it and Iíll be aware of it.
ANON: So, itís not about me storing everything in my head like this file cabinet.
ANON: This is a very new way of engaging my mind.
ELIAS: Which, you may discover, is much more efficient.
ANON: Itís a lot more fun, too.
ELIAS: And eliminates significant volumes of clutter.
ANON: Allows my creativity more, because then I donít doubt and my mind isnít responsible for worrying about things. Itís just I trust that itís going to be there. Itís a very good mind. It knows things, it knows how to... (Elias laughs) So, if I fail, which I wonít... I guess I need to go there. I guess I need to be okay with not passing the exam, or is that concentrating on failing?
ELIAS: Not necessarily, but I may express to you also that there is no wrong expression in generating your own determination that you shall not fail.
ANON: I really donít feel in my being that Iím going to fail. I really donít. I feel very capable and confident.
ELIAS: And that is an aspect of trusting yourself. Now you are moving into a wider expression of trusting yourself.
ANON: What this is asking for is a more specific trust of myself.
ELIAS: A broader trust of yourself.
ANON: Writing the exam is a broader trust of myself?
ELIAS: The assimilation of information, the new method, the recognition that your mind, so to speak, can access information and that the information is unnecessary to be stored within thoughts, and in the elimination of the clutter of thoughts and allowing yourself to assimilate information and know that it can be accessed and it can be generated when it is necessary, that broadens your trust of your ability. You already trust that you are capable.
ANON: I just always attach my capabilities to my ability to think in the old way. So now, when I recognize...
ELIAS: You also associate your ability and the trust of your ability with hard work and considerable effort. Now what you are experimenting with is broadening your trust of yourself, that hard work and considerable effort is not actually necessary.
ANON: And itís a waste of time and itís boring. (Elias laughs) It is! Itís awful.
I think I have time for one more quick question, and that is with reference to the litigation. You said that Iíve done it, but I havenít created the cleaning up of that yet. They havenít paid me and all that stuff. Am I still keeping that situation open, or does this require me to have a conversation with the man and finalize it? Do I need to participate in a physical way in having that...? There is a lot of money tied up in this stuff, and I feel like I need to sell all my investments and unblock the flow of the money energy in my life.
ELIAS: That is a choice. What is your assessment? What do you want?
ANON: I want money to just flow. Iím tired of playing the games with it. Iím tired of all the strings and the pushing and pulling thatís going on. On one hand, itís almost connecting with my partner energy, that itís just there. Itís flowing and engaging me, but Iím not receiving. For some reason, Iíve blocked it. Thereís a lot of negative energy tied up with my investments and investment brokers, so I kind of have the impression that I just need to sell it all and then do something else with it, just get rid of all that blocked energy or whatever, like cleaning out your closet.
ELIAS: I am understanding.
ANON: But then Iíve got this litigation thatís holding up... I feel like our company is just taking off now, and part of the requirement is that there be money to do what I want to do, and thatís a part of this reality. I donít make those rules, although Iím participating with them. I just want to clean up all this old stuff, and I want to concentrate on moving forward with my company. Thatís what Iím interested in, and I want to use my money in that regard. But Iíve got this litigation. I know Iím going all over the place here; I apologize. I thought I was more clear on it, but I donít want to go into the place of destitution, either, where Iíve spent everything and I have nothing for myself and then I always have to live on the edge. Thatís not where I want to go. Iím a little bit unclear.
ELIAS: I am understanding. But I may express to you, in your energy and your directions, it is highly unlikely that you shall create moving in destitution. This is...
ANON: Is it likely that I will create abundance? Iíve been working on this for a long time. I feel like Iíve made a lot of movement in it.
ANON: Itís just a matter of me allowing and receiving now.
ANON: And I donít even need to worry about it.
ELIAS: The key is the receiving, for that is more of a challenge for you.
ANON: Is there something that I can do with money to allow that? I know Iím focusing on this litigation, because I donít want the litigations hanging on anyway, regardless. I feel like I have completed that. My accomplishment in that company, I feel really happy with my accomplishment, and Iím thankful to the people. I learned there, I learned so much about myself, but itís still not closed yet. Iíve just wondered if I need to participate with it, to close it down once and for all.
ELIAS: That is a choice. You can, and if you engage that choice, be aware of your energy. Be aware of your energy that you do not project an energy of blame or expectation.
ANON: Iím not sure that I can do that right now. So, the other option is to just keep going and then it will resolve on its own?
ELIAS: It may.
ANON: Or is it resolved? Last time we talked it was already done. Iíd completed it.
ELIAS: In a matter of speaking, that is correct, but it is also a matter of trusting yourself and being aware of what type of energy you are projecting in association with any of these scenarios.
ANON: What am I projecting? Am I projecting doubt?
ELIAS: Not as much a projection of doubt, but there is a continuation somewhat of expectation.
ANON: Does that block the receiving?
ANON: So, instead of concentrating on expectation, which Iím doing, then just relax and bask in the receiving.
ANON: As if I was in a pool of water, and just receive.
ELIAS: You may. That is an adequate visualization. It is a matter of allowing yourself to receive. If you are genuinely practicing with that action in other scenarios and genuinely allowing yourself to receive, you shall become much more familiar with that action and with that energy and allow yourself to flow much more easily with that, which will so dissipate the expectations.
ANON: In receiving the energy of my potential partner, that was an act of receiving.
ANON: All of these things are interconnected with my ability to receive?
ANON: I get that. I feel they are very connected.
ELIAS: Yes, they are all interconnected.
ANON: This is actually even with writing my exam, my ability to receive my assimilation of the information.
ELIAS: YES, PRECISELY. It is all interconnected.
ANON: Really, writing that exam is just receiving information.
ANON: Well, that makes everything much clearer. (Elias laughs) Okay sweetie, itís time. (Laughs) Fantastic. I appreciate so much your input. I engage your energy. I allow you to support me much! (Laughs)
ELIAS: Very well, and so I shall.
ANON: All right, love. (Elias laughs) Weíll talk again.
ELIAS: I shall be anticipating of that, and I express to you, as always, my affection and my encouragement to you. Be successful.
ANON: I will. I already am.
ELIAS: But also, remember your playfulness.
ANON: Iím remembering: relax and play, relax and play.
ELIAS: Ah, very well! To you, my dear friend, in great lovingness, au revoir.
ANON: Au revoir.
Elias departs after 1 hour, 15 minutes.
© 2005 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.